Doing The Right Thing
by gatehead81
Summary: Jack and Sam finally get it together but nothing worked out as it should have. Their one night of shared passion has pushed things to the extreme and Sam is forced into making a tough choice. Not a S/J ship but getting close. Daniel/Teal'c/Janet featured.
1. Doing The Right Thing, Author Notes etc

**AUTHORS NOTES...**

**If you don't want to bother with the background and the odd bits of info the fic starts on the next page so feel free to jump on in…**

**DOING THE RIGHT THING. **

30,000ish words. 20ish chapters. Rated T just in case. Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Tragedy and Friendship and a little Homour.

Okay so I suppose there are a few things that you need to know about the following fic...

Firstly, to get it out of the way, the usual disclaimer applies as per profile page.

Secondly, Carter is my hero and therefore I give her a pretty hard time because I know she can take it, as a result Jack tends to get dragged along for the ride.

**Summary: **Jack and Sam finally get it together but nothing worked out the way it was supposed to. Their one night of shared passion has pushed things to the extreme and Sam is forced into making a tough choice. Join the gang on this emotional rollercoaster full of angst, hurt, tragedy and friendship, there's some humour in there too, just to lift the mood from time to time. Not quite an S/J ship but getting close.

For the purposes of this fic Pete does not and never has existed. He gets WAY too much page time for an unworthy character and a pain in the proverbial. (No disrespect to David DeLuise and his acting skills, I actually think he's pretty good, especially as Santa Jeff Mantell in Bones, 3.09. Santa In The Slush.)

**Spoilers: **The following episodes get a mention.

2.02 In The Line Of Duty,

4.03 Upgrades,

7.13 Grace,

7.17&18 Heroes Part 1&2

The spoiler for Heroes is on this page (below the line) Ironically you can read and enjoy 'Doing The Right Thing' without spoiling Heroes. Bet you're thinking 'Huh?' but all will become apparent for those in the know…

**Key characters **involved:- Jack, Sam, Janet, Daniel and Teal'c.

Characters briefly involved or mentioned:- SG's-13,3, Walter, Siler, Cassie Hammond and Makepeace.

Source for SG-13 names: .com/wiki/SG_team :- Col. Dave Dixon, Dr Cameron Balinsky, Senior Airman Simon Wells, Senior Airman Jake Bosworh. [For the purposes of this fic I have promoted Wells to Captain.] (Okay so for some reason I can't put the full name of the website up here but I think you can figure it out. It involve the words stargate and wikia.)

Set late in season 8.

I hereby do solemnly swear that I will do my best to post one or two chapters a night for the duration of this fic.

* * *

*******SPOILER ALERT!***** *****SPOILER ALERT!***** *****SPOILER ALERT!*******

* * *

For the purposes of this fic Janet is still alive because I need her to make this work. I thought about setting it earlier but Jack has to be a general to have the authority to make key decisions etc.

I think that is everything,

feel free to, comment, flame, nit pick and review as you see fit.

My writing motto: If I don't know it's broke, how can I fix it?

**ENJOY :)**


	2. Decision

**AN: Alrighty then, here we go...**

**

* * *

**

1. DECISION

* * *

Janet Frasier reached the end of her rope, this had gone far enough. "Listen to me Jack." She broke protocol and used his first name. "You cannot let her go. No matter how much she tries to justify or persuade you, not even if she does that whole hardcore silent rage thing. You have got to trust me on this one." She leaned across the table and stared straight into his eyes.

"Doc I…" He stalled wondering if the woman was trying to tell him something but he couldn't quite be sure. If Carter wanted to put in for reassignment, she wanted put in for reassignment. He didn't really blame her, not after everything that had happened. He really did not have any right to stop her. He could if he wanted to but… He refocused on the woman in front of him. "Why is this so important to you?"

Exasperated Janet hung her head. "It just is. Like I said you've got to trust me. Letting her go now will be the worst decision of your life."

"My life? It's got nothing to do with me!"

"Oh for god sake I give up." Janet looked at the man one more time but it was obvious his stubborn head wasn't going to budge. "Well when she comes to you with the letter will you at least delay her departure for a month? It's important."

Jack scratched his head. What possible difference could a month make? If he was totally honest, with the current level of weird he wasn't sure he could take another month. He wasn't even sure he could handle another day of Carter avoiding him, of Carter always exiting a room as he arrived, of Carter emailing him her reports instead of bringing them to him, of Carter never making eye contact unless she absolutely had too. She never smiled anymore. It was breaking his heart. "I'll do what I can Janet." He whispered, the lump in his throat catching him by surprise.

Janet stood silently in front of him for a moment, defeat hanging around her. She should have known she'd be no match for General O'Neill, especially as she couldn't tell him anything. "Please do Sir." Was all she said before she left the room.

* * *

Sam bit her lip as the butterflies whirled in her stomach. She had just hit print. It had taken her almost the full two weeks to compose the letter and an entire hour just to press the button but as far as she was concerned there was no going back now.

Deliberately she paced across the room and picked up the single sheet that had given her so much grief. Scanning it one more time she sighed at the sadness it invoked within her on so many levels. It was the right decision, she told herself for the umpteenth time. Not the one she wanted, not the one she needed but the right one for him and for her. It was time to move on and she had to do it fast.

Everything was already in place. She'd discussed the idea with her team, though they didn't know she'd actually made the decision. Daniel flat out did not believe she was serious and Teal'c had inclined his head in a way that told her he would be supportive no matter what she chose to do. She'd put her house on the market and found a temporary tenant, whom it turned out was a complete blabber mouth and had brought Janet running. Why she hadn't gone outside the area to advertise she really didn't know. All of her SGC projects were either finished up or ready to hand over to someone else. Even her personal stuff was organised in such a way that it would be easy to box up. All that was left now was to confirm the rumours and the speculation by giving the General the letter and then take the three weeks leave that was long overdue.

By the time that was over her reassignment paperwork should be completed and she would be off to greener pastures…Well newer ones anyway, she doubted how green they could be, what with everything that lay ahead of her.

She signed the official letter and sealed the envelope that had been waiting for days. No point in delaying things any longer. She headed for the door.

* * *

Janet spotted Sam moping in the corner of the rec-room. She'd been searching for her for about an hour and had given up, deciding to take an early dinner break and go play some air-hockey or something to try and take her mind off things. "Sam? What are you doing here? You never use the rec-room."

"Oh hi Janet." Sam looked up guilt all over her face. She was sure she would be safe here. No-one would ever think to look for her in the one place on the base designed for people to do nothing. Aside from the time when Teal'c had insisted on whupping her butt at mortal-kombat, this was only her third or fourth time she'd entered the room voluntarily in eight years. The retro machine still stood in the corner reminding her of her very public defeat. In her preoccupation she'd forgotten that Janet regularly used the space to blow off steam and enjoy the flirting and banter on offer. "What are you doing here?" She echoed lamely.

"I asked you first. I've been looking all over for you. What are you hiding in here for?"

"I'm not hiding! I just didn't have anything to do that's all."

Janet's hands were on her hips. "Yeah right. You…nothing to do. Are you avoiding me?"

Sam jumped to her feet. "Of course I'm not. Why would you think that?" Her face flushed and she had no choice but to look away from her best friend's questioning gaze. "Look I'm sorry Janet but I'm not avoiding you…not exactly. I'm more trying to be in places where…you…aren't." She shuffled awkwardly knowing that she sounded more like the General than herself, she never could lie to her friends. It was another reason why she had to go.

Janet sighed, deciding to give Sam a break. She had been riding her pretty hard lately. It didn't mean she was getting of the hook completely though. "Look I know I've been on your case a lot lately but you and I both know why." She glanced around the room and leaned in closer. "Can we go somewhere and talk?" She whispered to her friend, people were starting to tune into their conversation.

"No Janet we can't. There's nothing more to talk about. Besides it's too late, it's already done." Sam couldn't stop the twinge of pain, it was the first time she had confirmed the fact out loud.

Frasier's jaw fell open. She grabbed the taller blonde by the arm and dragged her from the room. "What do you mean it's already done?" She hissed.

Sam pulled her arm free. "I gave him the letter this afternoon. All my projects are wrapped up and I'm scheduled to go on leave at seventeen thirty. So…" She looked at her watch. "In fifty-seven minutes I am out of here, probably for good." Again Sam shifted restlessly.

Janet could think of nothing to say. Sam's words seemed so final, even if she didn't sound just as confident as she was trying to be. "Sam I-"

"Please Janet, this is hard enough. I need your support." Her voice was wavering and her eyes were over bright.

The doctor sighed. "Sam you know I'll always be there for you, as best that I can, but I have to push this. Can't you see how much of a mistake this is? Why don't you just tel-"

"Janet for the last time, I can't. He doesn't need this. The only reason that you're involved at all is because of your position as Chief Medical Officer." Irrational anger flared in Sam and she lashed out verbally, her tone rising to condescending. "And as CMO I'd like to remind you that you can not say anything without breaking your oath, so enough is enough I do not want to talk about it anymore." Sam turned on her heel and stalked off down the corridor.

Oh I don't think so. Janet knocked her fists together, two could play that game. She shot after her friend. "Actually, Colonel Carter, I think you will find you are wrong in that assertion." She mimicked the other woman's pitch exactly.

Sam froze mid-step. "What?" She asked cautiously.

Doctor Frasier drew level with her, looking her straight in the eye. "If I think a medical issue is directly affecting the health, rationale or mental state of an officer under my care, I have a duty to report it to my CO _regardless_ of said officer's wish for the issue to remain private. The only reason I haven't said anything to the General already is because I respect you too much. So don't push me Sam."

Carter's features drained of all colour. She had been so sure she'd gotten away with it, but now Janet could blow this for her right at the last minute. "You wouldn't?" She challenged. Her mind protested the direction her mouth took the conversation in.

"If I think it's in your best interests, I might."

Sam instantly thought she was going to throw up. She grabbed her friend's arms and began to beg. "Please Janet, you can't do that, you know why I've made this decision, please don't destroy this for me."

"_Destroy?_ Sam I'm not trying to destroy anything for you. I'm trying to save you from making a huge mistake. Can't you see what you're doing, what you're giving up?" Janet was pleading just as hard as Sam. Why wouldn't she see reason? "And Sam, I don't know why you're making this decision, not really, because you won't tell me." A foot stomped to emphasise her point.

"Because I can't." She confessed. "I can't do this to him. We'll both be court-marshalled for a start. Besides, he doesn't want to know."

"Of course he does!"

"No he doesn't." Sam was adamant. "We both agreed that it was a one time thing and that we should try to forget about it. I already told you what he said. '_The fate of the universe is way too big for us to give up, even for each other.'_ And I agree with him. So I gotta go Janet. I can't wait any longer."

"But Sam-"

"And what about you? Medically I can't go off-world anymore and I won't ask you to lie for me next time a mission comes up. I won't do that to you either. They need you around here just as much as they need him." Sam was close to tears. This was the first time she'd actually given her friend a full explanation. Or one that made sense at least.

"Sam you can't be worried about me at a time like this. You've got to do what's right for you, for you and-"

The door of the rec-room bounced open and two officers raced out into the hallway laughing and disappeared round the corner. Once over the initial shock of the interruption Janet took the opportunity to attempt to steer Sam away. They headed for the elevator but the woman pulled free and refused to budge any further.

"Sam we need to talk about this, properly. You need to tell me what is really going on inside your head. I want to support your decision, I really do. But first you need to talk to me." Janet put as much emotion as she could into her plea. If Sam wouldn't talk to her now things between them could get very cold, very fast.

Carter dithered for a moment then folded. "Fine. I'll talk to you, but not here." She indicated the grey walls around them. "Call round to my place about seven. I can't make any promises but I'll try to explain things then."

"Okay Sam, I'll be there. Until then try to take things easy. You need your rest."

Sam nodded as she drifted backwards down the corridor.

The sadness in her eyes tugged at Janet's heartstrings. Maybe this evening she would finally get some answers. Absolutely everything about this decision was wrong.

* * *

**AN: So there you go, chapter one. Two and three to follow presently. Please let me know what you think :)**

DOING THE RIGHT THING.


	3. Misunderstanding

**AN: Short chapter, next one is longer.**

* * *

2. MISUNDERSTANDING

* * *

Teal'c stood for a moment longer, watching through the glass as the leader of the Tauri's most important military base banged his head off his desk repeatedly. A few years ago he would have arched his eyebrow and questioned the sanity of any who would engage in such an act. Now he recognised it simply as one of the many ways O'Neill chose to vent his frustrations. Usually the impacting of the forehead upon a solid object represented a frustration over Samantha Carter; he had no reason to believe this time would be any different. Without knocking he entered the General's office.

Jack's head popped up. "Teal'c!" He squawked in surprise. "You could've knocked you know." He was suddenly angry at almost getting caught out. "I could have been doing anything."

"Indeed, such as venting your frustrations over Samantha Carter."

Jack nearly choked. "Excuse me?" His face was instantly burning and he would have given anything for the floor to swallow him up. Sure Sam got him hot but never so much so that he would have to do…_that_, here at his desk.

Teal'c was confused. "I merely was referring to the banging of your head."

Jack shot onto his feet. "Wow, wow Teal'c, enough with the euphemisms. God what is the _matter_ with you? And I wasn't doing that!" He was pacing back and forward behind his desk.

Teal'c blinked furiously and the eyebrow finally arched. "I believe you were."

It was such an authoritative statement that Jack's jaw dropped as he stilled and regarded the man. All he could do was shake his head in denial.

"I observed your actions through the glass not a moment ago."

Jack's cogs whirred. He heaved a sigh and dropped back into his chair as everything fell into place. "Oh you mean me banging my head on the table. I thought you meant…Never mind. What can I do for you big man?"

"I have come to remind you of your invite to the commissary to dine with myself and Daniel Jackson before we take our leave. We will be commencing in fifteen minutes." Teal'c drew himself up, his hands clasped behind his back as he awaited acceptance.

Jack rubbed his hands over his tired face. Right, the dinner invite. Why was even that stressing him out? "I dunno T, I've got a lot on. Just look at my desk."

Teal'c ran his eye over the clutter and papers strewn over the polished wood. "I see nothing out of the ordinary."

Jack tilted back in his chair and stared at the ceiling, he didn't feel up to playing spot the Jaffa jokes, or explaining anything. It was official, Carter actually wanted to leave and his heart was sore. "Look Teal'c I'm gonna pass. I just don't feel like company right now."

"O'Neill, what has transpired that is troubling you so?"

"Nothing Teal'c, nothing has _"transpired"_." He made air quotes. "I've just got a lot of work to do. It's got me a little stressed out that's all." He evaded the big man's eye.

Teal'c shifted slightly, O'Neill was deceiving him and not very covertly at that. He knew his friend found it impossible to admit directly that he wanted to talk and this was as close to an open invitation as ever he was likely to receive. He pulled out the chair opposite the General and patiently waited for the man to speak his mind.

Jack scrubbed his hands over his hair, still avoiding the gaze of his friend and his quiet persistence. After a few minutes he simply pushed Carter's letter across the table. Neither Teal'c nor Daniel knew about what had happened after the team night over a month ago but maybe it was time for the truth to come out.

* * *

**AN: Daniel's up next...**


	4. Discord

3. DISCORD

* * *

Daniel sat alone at SG-1's table. He'd arrived late as usual, and had been surprised to see the area empty. He had waited for almost twenty minutes for ever punctual Jack and Teal'c to show up but when they eventually didn't he went on ahead and plated up. It was now a full hour later and he was moping over his red jello and second mug of coffee. The least they could have done was let him know they weren't coming. It was bad enough that Sam had already left without waiting to eat.

They always dined together at the SGC on the eve of their down-time. It was a kind of sadistic ritual they went through, forcing themselves to eat commissary food even though they could be anywhere else on the planet, O'Mally's, Pizza Hut, anywhere. It was a way of gaining closure on the latest small but intense chapter of their lives. Jack still joined them even though he wasn't involved in the missions and never got the same time off as they did.

This was only the second time in eight years that he'd eaten alone on such a night…well when they were all uninjured and alive at least…even at that they always shared dessert around the sickbed of whoever took the hit, after they sneaked past Janet of course.

Daniel huffed and threw his spoon down. He was mad and he was disappointed. What could possibly be so important that all of his friends had stood him up?

As he bussed his tray and left the busy eating area he decided that he didn't even want to know. He was going home. It had been a long few weeks what with Sam's bad temper and Jack's overly sarcastic, even for him, acid tone.

Jack had turned him down flat when he'd asked for more time on the Odin excavation project on Hav'na, ripping him to shreds when he'd pushed him about it. Sure SG-11 could handle it, but it was his baby, he'd found it. Why shouldn't he be allowed another week to see it through to the end? Unfair.

Sam was tinkering with her new toys in the lab and Teal'c was leading on the training of the newest recruits in between hopping back and forth to Dakara. How come he wasn't allowed to do what he wanted too? It's not like the last of the backlog Jack had tasked him with was _that_ important. All his mission reports were up to date and all of the key artefacts and texts were fully labelled and translated. He'd even gone to the bother of setting everything down in an 'Artefacts for Dummies' style format so that Jack wouldn't need to ask for too much help understanding what was going on. But even that hadn't proven enough.

No it wasn't fair, all he'd wanted to do was go dig out the last of the seemingly Viking site on 5744, but of course, as usual, he wasn't allowed.

So he'd got himself and his team captured again, big deal, that was months ago and no-one had gotten hurt…largely due to Sam's rescue plan, but still…to _never_ be allowed to go off-world alone ever again! That was an overreaction.

* * *

Daniel grabbed his duffle bag from his quarters and headed towards the elevator. He grumbled to himself as the numbers climbed from somewhere near twenty-eight. Eventually the doors slid open to reveal O'Neill and Teal'c. Jackson's jaw set like stone.

"Ah good, there you are Daniel. We were just on our way to find you."

Daniel pushed between the two men as they stepped out. "Really Jack, well that's too bad because I was just on my way home, so another time."

"See Teal'c I told you he'd be mad."

"And I concurred."

Jack's hand shot out and trapped the elevator doors as they shifted from their brackets. "Wait a minute Daniel I can explain."

His hands came up quickly in an open surrender fashion as the man practically growled at him. "I'm sure you can but quite frankly I'm not interested. I think I've wasted enough time here for one evening so if you don't mind I'd like to be leaving now." He repeatedly pushed the button to close the doors causing Jack to have to flail his hand out again. Daniel stubbornly tried to pick his fingers off one by one until Jack gave up and let go.

The doors were almost closed on the huffiest Doctor Jackson Jack had ever seen when Teal'c jammed his arm in the gap and then inserted half of his mighty bulk into the car. "Daniel Jackson, we would like to endeavour to explain our absence from the commissary this evening."

"I told you Teal'c I don't want to know. If whatever it was, was so important that you couldn't even pick up the phone then you can deal with it on your own, I don't care. Now get out of my elevator and let me go home or I'll simply take the stairs."

"There are no stairs Daniel!" The glare he got caused him to shrink back, sarcasm wasn't helping.

"Fine, emergency escape hatch, whatever. I know there's more than one way out of here and I'm not afraid to use it."

Jack felt what little patience he had slipping away at the insubordinate tone. He had _so_ not wanted to come and find Daniel but Teal'c had insisted. "I told you it would be better to let him cool off first." He told the big Jaffa. "There's just no working with him when he's like this."

"No working with me! What about you, you've been a pain in the butt for the best part of a month. Ever since our last team night actually, I don't see why I should put up with it anymore."

"Oh don't tell me you're still sore 'cause I didn't let you go on your little archaeological excursion to P4B-5744. Daniel I explained why you couldn't go-"

"It's got nothing to do with that. I just want to go home, now get out of my car." He dug his heels in and tried with all his might to dislodge the Jaffa doorstop but it was a hopeless task.

"O'Neill give him the letter."

"What, no!"

"Give it to him. Even if he does not read it now it will explain all that he needs know."

Jack tried to stare down his larger friend but soon gave up. It was pointless to try and stare down a master, especially when you knew he had a point. Sighing he fished the envelope out of his inside pocket. He didn't want to hand it over. He wanted to keep it just in case Carter changed her mind, then he could tear it up on the spot, no matter where in the world he was. That way it would be done before she could flip-flop again.

But Sam Carter changed her mind about as often as she was wrong, which was never, so it really didn't matter.

He handed the letter over to Teal'c who in turn forced it into Daniel Jackson's hand. "You must promise that you will read this letter and when you do you must contact O'Neill and O'Neill only. The content of that letter is private and should not be viewed by anybody, not even you or I."

"Well why are you giving it to me then?" Daniel huffed, gracelessly shoving it into his pocket making Jack wince.

"All will become clear in time Daniel Jackson." Teal'c extracted himself from the elevator and the doors slicked shut leaving the Jaffa and the human alone in the corridor.

"I'm not entirely sure that was wise Teal'c." Jack sighed.

"There was no other way. As you said he is difficult to communicate with when he is so highly displeased with us."

"I don't think I quite said that, but still." He looked wistfully at the climbing numbers.

"It was the simplest way to achieve our task."

"What if he doesn't read it?"

"He is Daniel Jackson." Stated the Jaffa as he headed off along the short distance to his quarters.

Jack threw his hands up in agreement. "Yeah okay you're right there but what if he goes straight to Carter?"

"He will not."

Jack scratched his head as they halted outside the Jaffa's door. "How can you be so sure?"

"Because I have asked him not to. Goodnight O'Neill." Teal'c bowed and closed the door leaving Jack standing alone in the corridor.

With a shrug he headed off towards bed before halting and looking at his watch. "Where the hell am I going, it's only seven o' clock!" He shook himself and head back towards his office, he still did have a lot of work to do.

* * *

**AN: So that's the backgroud done, onwards... tomorrow night, I promise.**


	5. Bleeding Heart

**AN: Thanks for the reviews :) Now we finally get to see what this is all about...if you haven't already guessed.**

* * *

4. BLEEDING HEART

* * *

Sam paced back and forwards in her own home. She had to convince Janet that she was doing the right thing. If she couldn't get Janet onside then there was no hope of convincing the guys.

Jack had been surprisingly vocal about her leaving, telling her that he thought it was a mistake and that they could get past everything if they just had a little more time. It was obvious he didn't really believe that any more than she did. This wasn't just something you _'got past'_ and besides, he didn't know the half of it and he hadn't read her letter at that stage.

If it had been a simple case of her sleeping with her CO…god how could she ever use the words _'simple'_ and _'her CO'_ in the same sentence…then she could probably get past it but the fact was she was pregnant with Jack O'Neill's child and there was nothing she could do about it. Well not nothing, but there was nothing she was willing to do about it. No she couldn't stay. She'd be risking her own career and his by staying.

It was bad enough that Janet had figured it all out. Why couldn't the woman just have bought that it was a one night stand and that she didn't know who the father was? Because Sam Carter didn't do one night stands and Janet Frasier, her best friend, knew that only too well.

Sam stopped pacing.

But that's exactly what it had been when she thought about it. I mean it only happened the once, well twice on the one night, and it was _definitely_ never going to happen again, so by all definitions that made it a one night stand. Did it matter that the person it had been with was the one person she'd been in love with for years? The one person she'd given up on all others for. The one person she could never have but somehow accidentally did and now was in this whole mess because of?

She sighed and flopped down on the couch, _the_ couch. If only it hadn't been her turn to host, if only she hadn't had that extra glass or two of wine, if only she hadn't sent Daniel home with Teal'c. The list went on. If only she hadn't accepted that pat on the cushion beside him as they laughed at some inane joke she couldn't even remember, if only she hadn't been in love with him from the very beginning.

Pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes, her fingers through her short hair she tried to eradicate the memories that were invading her mind. But the image of Jack O'Neill's naked flesh and the pleasure that he drew out of her took over and suddenly she wasn't sorry anymore. Suddenly she felt like the luckiest woman alive.

Even if only for one night and even with this whole mess, it was worth it. It would always be worth it to have that one memory of being with him. And ready or not in just over seven months she would have a constant and very permanent reminder of the man she loved in her life. If she could never have him at least she would have his child. It was just a shame that the man would never know his son or daughter.

Guilt welled up through her. Maybe later, when he had retired she could tell him, but even then it would be risky. They could still be brought up on charges and there was no way she was going to leave her baby without a mother while she languished in jail for a crime that was anything but a crime. Besides he'd be absolutely furious at her deception. No she was doing the right thing.

Just then the doorbell rang and Sam hurried to open it, more ready than she'd ever been in her life to pour her heart out to her best friend.

* * *

Janet sat and listened. She never in a million years thought she would be hearing such words from her best friend, such candour, so many intimate details…not about the physical side of things…but about the mile a minute heart beat and the never wanting things to end, about the crushing reality of the morning after and the painful conversation about setting things right and moving on.

Sam had confided in her almost straight away after it had happened but she'd never mentioned the pain that she was in over it, or the confusion. She was feeling all of those things before Janet had had to break the news to her making everything a hundred times worse.

It was obvious now that Sam Carter loved Jack O'Neill beyond the moon and the stars and because of that she was prepared to sacrifice everything for him, even the man himself.

While the doctor still felt strongly that it was the wrong decision she respected the woman's wishes and even admired her strength. To give up everything and everyone she ever knew in order to go and raise the man she was protecting's child was way, way beyond the call of duty.

Sam was going to have to leave behind the SGC and all her friends, with one exception because neither of them could see a way that they could all stay in touch without Jack finding out. Daniel wouldn't be able to keep it from him and it wasn't fair to stay in touch with one friend and not another, so Teal'c was out. Cassie knew how to keep a secret but even this might be too big for her and then there was Jack himself. It was going to break Sam's heart not to ever be able to talk to him again but that was the only way this was going to work. Sam simply didn't trust herself not to tell him some day either by accident or out of need. Truth be told Janet was going to find that bit virtually impossible herself. With any luck at all O'Neill would ban the subject of Carter from the discussion list and it would never come up and she would never have to lie to him about her best friend and their secret love child. Frasier's head dropped into her hands.

"Janet, are you okay?"

"Hm, yeah I'm fine, it's just this is a lot to take in."

"How do you think I feel?" She smiled wanely.

In truth Sam was relieved, things were going better than she'd expected. Janet obviously got it and had said she would support her as best she could.

"It's just…are you sure Sam? I know he'd want to know and if you do this he can never find out. He'd never forgive you. You're essentially _choosing _to take a second child away from him."

Sam groaned. "Jan-net, don't say it like that, you make me sound like a monster." She dropped her head onto her friend's shoulder as the guilt overwhelmed her again.

"I'm sorry Sam but you've got to face this from all angles. Are you sure you can do that to him? Is that what you really want? And what about the kid, shouldn't he or she know who their own father is?"

"Stop, stop, please you're just torturing me. Don't you think I've thought about all that a thousand times? No this is for the best Janet." Sam lifted her head and wiped the tears from her eyes. "I've got to go and he must _never_ find out about any of this."

Janet sighed and took another sip of her long cold coffee. "Okay Sam I'll do what I can to help you, but I don't like the thought of you being so far away and on your own. I mean Canada is a whole other country for god sakes."

"I know Janet but the job's a good one and the US military doesn't have jurisdiction, they can't just call me back up if I'm working in another country."

Silence descended on the two miserable women. Eventually Janet stirred. "Sam?"

"Yeah."

"What happens if he doesn't let you go?" Janet bit her lip feeling a pang run through her.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, he doesn't have to accept your request."

"Then I'll go over his head." She uttered without thinking.

Janet sucked in a doubtful breath. "The big dogs aren't all that likely to let you resign without his say so. He is the one who decides who is most valuable to the programme after all."

"After Hammond. That's why I'm asking for reassignment first. It should be easier to step out of a desk job in Washington, especially if I offer to consult as a civilian for a while. I've got it all worked out." Sam's blue eyes openly regarded her friend. "Do you really think he would stop me from leaving?" The thought hadn't even occurred to her.

Janet swallowed hard, what had she done? "He might try Carter, you are a _'national treasure'_ after all."

Sam smiled despite herself. She'd forgotten he'd called her that. There were so many little things that she couldn't quite remember off the top of her head, they were all in there though if she really took the time to think about it. Her face dropped again. "Janet if he doesn't let me go I don't know what I'll do. I never even…Do you think he'd buy the whole one night stand thing?"

Frasier's eyebrows skyrocketed. "Not a chance in hell. Besides even if he did it would only last up until the day the baby's born. It's gonna look exactly like him you know."

"You don't know that."

"Ah, how could it not? Anything with Jack O'Neill's DNA is going to look like Jack O'Neill and you know it."

"Not helping Janet." Sam buried her face in the cushions of the couch.

"I'm sorry Sam." She genuinely was, this was no position for her friend to be in but here she was. "Okay, okay, I'll tell you what, if he decides not let you go I'll help you come up with a cover story."

"For why it looks like him!" Sam turned her disbelieving face up towards her friend.

That stumped her. "Well, we'll cross that bridge when we have to. Maybe we shouldn't get too far ahead of ourselves."

"Oh god Janet, how did I end up in this mess? I don't know if I can do any of this. Maybe it's not too late to get rid…No I can't even say it. What am I going to do?" Her face disappeared again.

At first Janet thought she was crying but the shocking sound of manic laughter caused her to fight back the giggles. Then even though none of it was funny the two women broke into hysterics as the strain of the situation became too much.

It was a while after the laughter had subsided that Sam's tears started, Janet knew they would eventually and was as wholly prepared for them as she could be but it was almost three in the morning before they finally arrived and Janet was glad Cassie had gone to stay with a friend for a few days, it was shaping up to be a very long night.

* * *

**AN: Okay so I don't know anything about US military jurisdictional boundries. I have no idea whither Carter could be called back to duty if she was working in another country, so just go with it please... Back to Jack tomorrow night, I know I'm jumping around a bit, but it's necessary.**


	6. Normality

**AN: Just a reminder, the members of SG-13 are Col. Dave Dixon, Dr Cameron Balinsky, Senior Airman Simon Wells, Senior Airman Jake Bosworh. [For the purposes of this fic I have promoted Wells to Captain, it is a year later after all.]**

**I chose SG-13 as a little acknowledgement of my ignoring of the events of Heroes, out of respect for Janet Frasier. **

**Loving the reviews by the way, thanks a bunch :)**

* * *

5. NORMALITY

* * *

Something abrasive and loud crashed through Jack's skull causing him to jump. He landed with a thump on the floor and couldn't figure out what was going on. How the hell did he end up on his ass and what the hell was that racket? He looked around and saw the legs of his desk and his missing pen. He must have fallen asleep in his office…again. That would account for the crick in his neck and the sheet of paper stuck to his face. He plucked it off and looked at his watch. It was four am and the incoming wormhole klaxon was screaming through the base. He scrambled to his feet and bolted for the door. "What we got?" He asked the night duty tech.

"Ah looks like SG-13. They are not scheduled to return until oh-nine hundred hours, Sir."

Jack felt a flow of adrenaline open up all his senses. "Roger that." He reached for the mic. "Defence teams stand by." The rumbling sound in the room below him was perforated with a few low clanks as the SF's fell into place at his command. As a single unit their weapons locked into position just as the kawoosh swallowed half the room and fell back upon itself.

Jack waited the mandatory few seconds. "This is General O'Neill of Stargate Command do you copy?"

"Ah yeah General, open the Iris, we got a situation."

"Colonel Dixon you wanna give me a little more information?"

His face finally appeared on the vid-screen. "We're gettin' it hot 'n' heavy from the locals, need to get our asses out of here, Balinsky has already taken a hit. I'm not sure if these darts are loaded or not but…" A shadow passed across the screen and Dixon looked down. "Strike that, the darts are definitely loaded, permission to get the hell out of here, Sir?"

"Permission granted, come on home airmen." Jack let go of the mic and turned to the tech. "Open the iris, get a med team down there and page Doctor Frasier, she's gone home for the evening. If we are dealing with poison darts she's the one we need."

He didn't even wait for the tech to nod before he headed for the gateroom. Instinctively he ducked back out through the door as several darts and an arrow preceded his team through the event horizon. Wells and Bosworth half carried, half dragged Balinsky home, quickly followed by Dixon.

"Lock it up!" The Colonel yelled before turning and removing a small blue feathered dart from his arm. He made it half way down the ramp before collapsing under the influence of whatever the tip contained.

"Medic!" Shouted the General as he dropped to the man's side. "What happened out there Colonel?"

The wormhole disengaged.

Dave Dixon's eyes rolled back in his head twice before they came back round. "Just the usual, Sir. We were ambushed by a bunch of locals in native dress screaming a hullabaloo. Seems we did it again. Balinsky warned us the area could be sacred but you know what I'm like, bunch of mumbo jumbo, guess I should have listened to him."

Jack took the man's hand as he writhed in sudden agony. "Don't worry about it Colonel, just take it easy, you're all home now and Janet's on her way in. Have you back on your feet in no time flat."

"Yessir." He forced out through gritted teeth.

With that, the medics were on scene and fussing around him.

Bosworth and the recently promoted Captain Wells hovered anxiously at the base of the ramp as their team mates were carted off. It was obvious the two men wanted nothing more than to go with their friends but they had to await their orders. Jack surveyed them for a moment. "Either of you two hurt?"

Two heads switched in unison, a clear negative. Jack nodded once. "Go get cleaned up, then report to the infirmary. I'll be along in about an hour, if not sooner for an update."

"Yessir!" They barked and hurried from the room.

Jack could still smell their adrenaline after they had left. It was something he both despised and craved in equal measure. What he wouldn't give to be going back out through the 'gate again on regular missions. Why then…his mind demanded…was Carter willing to give that up? She loved it just as much as he did. He pushed the thought aside and refocused his attention. "Stand-down." He muttered to the men who were still on high alert awaiting his order. It was obvious the threat was passed but they were good soldiers, good men. They would never assume an order and he liked that…even if it was a little routine.

"Airman…Wyatt." He called as he read the name on the closest SF's shirt. "See if you can't get that spear and those darts down from there." They were hanging from the wall some twelve feet up. Somehow they'd managed to stick themselves into the solid structure. Probably naquadah or trinium based he reckoned. "Bag them and take them to the infirmary. Doctor Frasier will no doubt need to analyse their content before she can make an antidote." He waved his hand dismissively as he left the airmen to it. "Oh, and be careful." he called back in. "That stuff seems to be pretty potent, I seriously do not need any more of you ending up in the infirmary because of it."

After checking that Doctor Frasier was in fact on her way in Jack headed for the commissary. A heavy coffee injection was required, it was four-fifteen and another long day had just begun. There was no point in trying to get any more sleep now. Two of his men were injured and that meant more fretting and more paperwork. Damn he hated paperwork.

* * *

**AN: So what do you think, sound like life at the SGC for Jack? **


	7. Duty Calls

**AN: The details about accessing the SGC are not strictly accurate, but you'll forgive me I'm sure. It was just the way it tripped of the tongue…**

* * *

6. DUTY CALLS

* * *

Janet Frasier raced from the car park at the entrance to Cheyenne Mountain. She reached the barrier and jammed her hand onto the palm-scanner. The guards on duty let her past without signing in as she flashed her medical badge at them. It was twenty-to-five in the morning and she was obviously in a hurry to get inside. They had heard the klaxons and so weren't surprised to see her arrive thirty or so minutes later all adrenaline and haste.

The elevator ride down through the mountain never seemed longer than when she was called in in the middle of the night. Glad she had still been at Sam's house, which was a good ten minutes closer, she used the knowledge of the extra time to settle herself down. She had no idea what she would be walking into and needed to be on top of her game.

Again she flashed the guard at the check point between elevators and he gave her no trouble. They would come and find her later, get her to sign the sheets and all would be right with the world. Rules of this nature were occasionally flouted within the base as everyone looked out for each other. These guys knew that a fellow soldier's life hung in the balance and delaying to sign a piece of paper could quite literally make all the difference. Janet had made that mistake once and would never make it again. Carol Sanchez had bled out while she dithered at the top signing her name and adhering to protocol. In the big picture it probably wouldn't have mattered but at least she would have been there when the woman died.

The elevator doors opened on the infirmary level and Frasier clicked into high gear. It was as if the glare of the lights and the heightened level of activity were all she needed. She grabbed the arm of the nearest orderly. "Right, so fill me in. What do we got and where do you need me?"

"This way Doctor Frasier, it's SG-13…"

* * *

Jack rumbled around the commissary. It wasn't time to go recheck on his airmen yet without seeming overly concerned and he could settle to little else. He had recieved the message that Frasier had arrived almost two hours previous and was doing all she could. Captain Wells had stopped in briefly to gather coffee for himself and Bosworth and had updated the General since the last time he'd swung by the infirmary.

The affected airmen had gone into anaphylactic shock but were stable for the moment. Janet had given them epinephrine, broad spectrum anti-histamines and anti-inflammatories which had put a stay on their deterioration but both men still looked like that girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory that the oompa-loompas had rolled away…minus the purple hue of course. The Doctor was already working on a more specific antidote and no doubt soon everything would be back to normal. Why then did he feel so unsettled? He took one more roam around the empty room and suppressed a yawn. Despite his fatigue his heart was hammering in a way that had nothing to do with adrenaline. No more coffee for him…for a few hours at least. He was no Daniel, he couldn't handle it.

Daniel…

He let his thoughts wander to the archaeologist for a bit. He hated the fact that the man had left under a head of steam. He did not blame him and knew he would understand once he read Sam's letter and heard what he had to say on the matter. Maybe he should call him? No Jack don't be stupid. It's half six in the morning, the man is on down-time and is still mad at you. That meant he would have to wait until at least eight o'clock before attempting to contact him.

He threw himself into a seat and rested his head on the table. Why did friendships have to be so difficult? He'd never had an easy run with Daniel, not even when the man was dead and ascended. For an annoying, jerk scientist he had sure wormed his way in. It had stung a little in the beginning to have his life saved by a pansy but Daniel wouldn't be Daniel if he didn't wear his heart on his sleeve. Doctor Jackson had taught him much along the way and Jack was thankful for it…not that he would _ever_ tell him that. He knew that he knew and that was enough for both of them. He sighed into the crook of his arm and closed his eyes. Daniel was his best friend and he was feeling hurt. It was up to him to fix it. It was his duty as a friend and Jack O'Neill didn't let his friends down.

**

* * *

**

AN: Carol Sanchez is a name I picked at random. I know there was a Sanchez on SG-11 but he was purportedly KIA in 4.08 The First Ones.


	8. Awakening

**AN: Morning arrives in various forms for SG-1...**

**Cheers for all the on-going reviews and additions to Alerts and Favourites etc, you guys are great :)**

* * *

7. AWAKENING

* * *

Once again Teal'c found himself observing Brigadier General Jack O'Neill undetected. Once again the man's head was connected to a piece of hardwood. This time, however, he was asleep at their usual table in the commissary. He made his way over and silently sat down opposite the sleeping man. He did not stir as Teal'c placed the tray on the table and began to unload it one item at a time. Even as he placed the empty tray on the floor there was no movement. Teal'c knew the man had had very little sleep in days if not weeks but this was no place for the leader of the SGC to be found 'napping'. He frowned, he still didn't like the word.

For the moment there was no need to disturb him. The room was still empty but very soon the shifts would change and the night personnel would be arriving in search of sustenance before sleep. Even now the early arrivals for the day shift were drifting about the base, showering and making themselves ready for duty.

Two marines entered and cast a glance in Teal'c direction. At first they seemed unconcerned but by the time they had reached the serving hatch their interest was growing. It wasn't much but it was enough to merit action.

Teal'c banged his coffee mug down on the counter and O'Neill started into wakefulness. "Huh, whazzza?" He asked looking around with unseeing eyes.

"Good morning, General O'Neill." Teal'c intoned and pushed a second mug towards the man.

"Gud' murnin." Mumbled Jack automatically. He shook his head and rubbed his hands across his eyes. It was bright in here. Where was 'here' exactly? He spied the steaming mug in front of him and made a grab for it before looking around properly. The commissary? What the hell was he doing sleeping in the commissary? That did not bode well, he'd have to stop falling asleep all over the base. Maybe he was getting too old for all this stress. "How long have you been here?" He asked the Jaffa trying to gauge how long he'd been out for and how many people might have seen him.

"Ten minutes." Came the answer between mouthfuls of bacon and eggs.

"And you didn't think to wake me?"

"There was no need. No-one but you and I were present. I awoke you as soon as the other personnel began to arrive."

"Oh right…thanks." Jack was a little placated. He should have known Teal'c would never allow him to make himself look stupid.

"It would be advisable to procure some breakfast before the morning rush."

It was already beginning to get busy in the communal hall. Jack nodded and rose from the table. He 'procured' himself his favourite breakfast of fruitloops, toast and orange juice, detoured for a fresh coffee and headed back to sit with Teal'c. It was eight-oh-five and the shifts had changed. Jack nodded to the night personnel he recognised from a few hours ago. Openly he yawned and observed Teal'c's plate. "You sure you got enough there?" It was their usual breakfast conversation.

"As always O'Neill."

Jack nodded round his toast. "So you ready for the off?"

"As always O'Neill."

Jack swung his spoon empty around in the air. "You know Teal'c you've got a real way with words about you today."

The Jaffa smiled. "As alw…"

"Don't push it T." The smile widened and Jack, dropping his spoon into the bowl, knew he had lost the first round of the day. The contest between them this month was patience.

O'Neill _patiently_ waited for the big man to finish up then they headed for the elevator. He pushed the button for quarters for Teal'c and then the infirmary for himself.

"Are you not accompanying me to the embarkation room?"

"I'll meet you there T-Man, gotta check on the kids first. By the time you don your robe and grab your staff from the armoury I'll be down to see you off to the sunny climes of Chulak."

"It is nice this time of year." Teal'c bowed as a grinning Jack stepped backwards out of the elevator.

* * *

Daniel tossed and turned. He'd been fully awake for over an hour but hadn't bothered getting up. He had promised himself a lie-in and dag-nam-it he was going to get one. Now he didn't see the point. Lie-ins were for snoozing and enjoying the comfort and warmth of your own bed. He was doing neither, he was brooding over recent events. Sighing he tossed back the covers and paddled to the shower. He had a lot to think about today but first he needed to sort himself out and have a shave. Opening that box of wine had been a very bad idea.

It was ten o'clock when Daniel finally wandered out into the kitchen and put the kettle on. Coffee withdrawal was well established and even brushing his teeth hadn't fully eradicated the a-monkey-slept-in-my-mouth-last-night sensation. He poured a glass of water and bombed two painkillers.

Dry toast accompanied his coffee as he wandered through to the tiny living room of his abode. He flicked the radio on and contemplated doing some shopping. Things were bad if he couldn't even get anything to put on the bread he'd pulled out of the freezer. A few minutes later he turned the radio back off again. The world news just seemed so mundane once you knew of the bigger picture, especially after having been ascended and then sent back. Instead he opened up his laptop intending to search for an active dig that he could assist on during his three weeks off. Jack might be able to stop him from digging off-world but he sure as hell couldn't stop him on his own time. An e-mail alert dragged his attention away from huffing with Jack. It was from Sam and had only been sent twenty minutes earlier. Curious he opened it.

"_Hi Daniel,_

_We gotta talk. Give me a call and we'll set it up._

_Luv_

_Sam X"_

Daniel frowned and leaned back in his seat. It was highly unusual for Sam to e-mail him about anything, never mind something so vague in nature. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Unsurprised he noted one missed call on the register. She must have tried calling him while he was in the shower, that was the only explanation. He flicked it open and his brows furrowed as he read the number. It was from the base, Teal'c's private line. Hadn't Teal'c left for Chulak this morning? He checked the time code and realised it was from earlier, before the Jaffa had been scheduled to leave. He also noted that his phone was on silent. Snapping the cell shut Daniel suddenly remembered he was still mad at Teal'c. He was still mad at all of them, but Sam's cryptic e-mail had his curiosity piqued. Unsure if he actually wanted to talk to her just yet he opted to e-mail her back.

"_How about you call me. Daniel."_

That aught to let her know he was still mad. She hadn't even seemed to notice when she was leaving the day before, but if she thought she was getting off the hook any more than the guys, she was mistaken. Tradition was tradition and there was no excuse for breaking it, not in Daniel's eyes. Not unless the situation was life or death, which it obviously wasn't as everyone was still off duty and doing their own thing.

The cell in Daniel's hand flashed a low battery warning so he stuck it on the charge and headed for the door. He needed to do some grocery shopping, the dry toast hadn't quite cut it and he had nothing but leftover Chinese which the thought of was turning his somewhat delicate stomach.

Even as the door slammed shut his phone began to vibrate on the desk. It remained active for about another thirty seconds before the screen went dark and another missed call periodically flashed at the ceiling.

* * *

Sam cursed in frustration as Daniel's cell went over to answer service. There was no point in leaving a message, he knew what she wanted. Maybe she should just call round and see him. She chewed on the inside of her lip.

About an hour previous she had woken up with the overwhelming urge to tell him that she was leaving. That urge had now turned into a need and she couldn't wait much longer. Unable to pluck up the courage to call him she had e-mailed and had been awaiting a response ever since. When her computer had chimed in the place of a phone call she was more than a little surprised. The six word response left her feeling confused. Was he angry with her about something? If so she wondered what it could be and now he hadn't answered. Had he rejected her call?

Reaching a decision she grabbed for her sweater. Wearing a circular hole in her carpet wasn't going to get her anywhere, she needed to speak to him.

* * *

**AN: Long chapter next, will post in a few hours...**


	9. Revelation

**AN: As promised, chapter 8**

* * *

8. REVELATIONS

* * *

Daniel sat in the small café near the corner of the street his apartment was on. His latte was going down well and he was starting to feel vaguely human again. Finishing the last of his bagel he pushed the plate away and stretched out against the back of the stool he was on. He loved this spot by the window.

As he so often did he let himself get sucked into watching the world go by. So many people, so many lives. Everyone doing their own thing, everyone thinking their place in the cosmos was more important than the next person's. It was amazing, he mused, how some people looked almost identical to other people. He was sure he'd just seen Sam go by in her new car but that was impossible. Sam was at home waiting for his call…or trying to call him. Daniel patted himself down then searched out his jacket pockets where it hung behind him. Shrugging he remembered he hadn't taken his cell with him, she would just have to wait.

His fingers chanced upon something in his inside pocket. Wondering what it was he removed it. He unfolded the envelope and recalled Teal'c pushing it into his hand the evening before. Fingering the flap he noted that it had been re-stuck more than once. Maybe he should open it. He turned it over and read the General's full title in Sam's handwriting. He ran a single finger over the lettering. It was all very formal. He hooked a thumbnail under the edge of the flap just as the waitress arrived causing him to absently set the letter down as he looked up.

Two shining brown eyes sparkled down at him under a head of flowing dark hair. Briefly he was reminded of Sha're and it made his heart flutter. The figure in front of him flitted nervously and it was obvious that she was quite taken with him.

"Can I get you anything else, sir?" She blushed.

Regaining his senses Daniel cleared his throat and looked away. The girl couldn't have been more than seventeen and his reaction had made him feel awkward.

"No that will be all thank you." He flipped open his wallet, gave her an uncharacteristically generous tip, gathered up his stuff and left.

* * *

To say that Daniel was surprised to see Sam sitting on his steps was an understatement. He stopped short and stared at her. The woman hadn't seen him yet and was chewing her nails…never a good sign. He walked over to her. "What are you doing here Sam?" He kept his tone a little on the cool side.

Her head flicked up, her eyes registering surprise as she took him in. "Oh, hi Daniel. I was waiting for you." She pushed quickly to her feet.

"Well I can see that." Daniel's irritation instantly disappeared when it dawned on him that Sam seemed highly agitated. "Is everything okay?" She covered the distance to him in two steps and grabbed his arm.

"Everything's fine Daniel…well not fine exactly, I just need to talk to you. I have to tell you something." She let go of him, turned away and then turned back to him looking him in the eye. "I tried to call but you didn't answer."

Her eyes shone with all sorts of emotions that Daniel couldn't decipher. "Yeah sorry about that Sam but my phone is on the charge inside." He used his head to indicate the building because his hands were full with the groceries that he'd bought.

"Oh here let me help you with some of those." Sam belatedly offered and took one of the bags from him. She was relieved he hadn't been purposely ignoring her.

"Thanks Sam, come on up. I'll put the kettle on."

Sam smiled, grateful that her friend didn't mind the intrusion on his first day off, which ordinarily they spent totally alone and loving it.

* * *

"You really should look about getting a new place you know." she voiced absentmindedly as they rounded the corner on the last flight of stairs. Daniel's flat was four floors up and the elevator was, as it had been from day one, 'temporarily out of order'. It wasn't that Sam minded the exercise. The opposite was in fact true. It gave her a little more time to sort through things in her head.

"Mmm, I thought about it but I like it here and the rent is cheap." Daniel said as he stuck his key in the door. Sam rolled her eyes. "The neighbours are friendly too. That's Mrs Opik's cat, Biscuit. He likes to come over and visit sometimes. Ironically he's not allowed any of his namesake." He lowered his voice to a gossip's whisper. "He's got diabetes."

"Right." Sam looked at the great hulking ginger tom that sat down the hall on what she presumed was its own doorstep. Regally it turned its head away and gave its tail a swish. Screwing up her face Sam decided she didn't like it, too stuck up she reckoned.

Daniel caught the look. "I thought you liked cats?"

She huffed out a sigh. "Why does everyone think that? I_ hate_ cats."

"But Schrödinger?"

"For god sake! The clue is in the name…Schrödinger!"

Daniel looked as blank as O'Neill on a good day.

"As in Erwin Schrödinger…1935…the Australian physicist who's Paradoxical Thought Experiment used the notion of a cat in a box being both alive and dead at the same time to explain the problem of the Copenhagen Interpretation of quantum mechanics."

Daniel's door was half ajar but his mouth hung open all the way. "Sam…What, the, hell, are you talking about?"

"Oh never mind. I just don't like cats. I only gave Nar'eem a cat because we'd been discussing the experiment. And I only like Schrödinger because he reminds me of Nar'eem."

"Oh, okay, so no cats then, got it." He disappeared in through the door.

* * *

Sam's preoccupation returned as she wandered in through the door of Daniel's tiny apartment and looked around at the cramped, cluttered space. Now she remembered why they never came here on team nights. The memory of the last team night made her stomach flip and she shook it off before Daniel noticed a second emotion she didn't want him too. He had taken his shoes off and was padding about aimlessly. Without warning he turned and relieved her of her burden. Following suit she took her own heeled boots off and headed for the sofa.

"Coffee?" shouted Daniel from the adjoining room.

"Yeah sure." She called back. "Ah, no actually…" She remembered. "You'd better make that a tea, herbal if you have any. If not hot water's fine."

"Tea, Sam?" Daniel wandered back into the room. "What's the matter, too much coffee already today?"

"Ah no, I'm trying to cut down is all." Sam said, thinking fast. "You should too ya know."

"Somehow I don't think that's going to happen." He smiled at her.

He pulled off his jacket and threw it over the nearest chair. Something fell out onto the floor as he disappeared back into the other room. Sam bent down to pick up the errant envelope. Her heart almost stopped as she registered what it was. So that was why he had been so short with her. He already knew. But what the hell was he doing with the letter? That was private. She stretched out her hand and picked it up.

"How come you have this?" She asked as he re-entered the room with two mugs.

"Oh, ah, that." Daniel's face flushed as he registered the outrage on Sam's features. "I was still mad at the guys and wouldn't listen to them so Jack…well Teal'c really made me take it so that I would understand."

Sam straightened her back. "So Teal'c knows too."

"Ah, I guess so." Daniel set the two mugs on the table, his eyes growing wide as Sam turned a most unusual shade of puce.

"That unbelievable son of a bitch. He had absolutely no right telling either of you, let alone showing you _this_." Sam was as furious as she had ever been in her life. Jack O'Neill had gone _way_ too far this time. She flashed the letter in Daniel's face. "This. This is totally private. I can't believe he told you. I'm gonna kill him. He had no right, no right at all. It was up to _me_ to tell you that I'm leaving, not _him_. How dare he? What the hell is he trying to achieve?"

"Sam I haven't…wait a minute, you're _leaving_?" Daniel felt the bottom fall out of his world.

"Yeah! This is my letter requesting reassignment. I can't believe…" She turned and looked at him. "Hang on, you didn't know?"

"No Sam I had no idea…" Daniel felt his chest swell and his throat dry up stealing the rest of his words.

"So General O'Neill didn't tell you I was leaving?"

"Noooo." Daniel wailed, feeling like a child who'd just been told Santa didn't exist…or that his parents had just died.

Sam practically fell onto the sofa her head buried in her hands. "God, Daniel I'm sorry. I never intended for you to find out like this. I wanted to tell you, that's why I came over here. I just saw the letter and assumed. God I feel terrible. I'm so sorry."

"But wh-hy Sam?" Daniel couldn't find a level tone, he couldn't stop his heart from racing, he couldn't stop the anguished keening in his head.

There was only one course of action left. Sam closed her eyes and spilled her guts. "Because I slept with Jack after our last team night and I can't take it anymore."

"Huh?" Daniel was sure he had misheard. No way had Sam Carter just said what he thought she had said. "Nu-uh." He shook his head at her.

She looked up at him, then away. "Yes, Daniel, I did. And it was the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life, 'cause now it's gone and ruined everything and I have to leave." Sam shoved the despair that the tears were piggy-backing on back down her throat. She could not allow herself to cry, not after what she'd just done to Daniel.

"No Sam." Defiantly he came to stand in front of her.

Slowly she raised her eyes to his. "Yes Daniel." She swallowed hard. "I have to go. I can't be around him anymore." There wasn't even the slightest element of untruth in what she had just said.

Daniel dropped to his knees, his legs no longer able to support him. "You can work it out, give it more time it's only been what, a month?" Desperation pitched his voice too high.

"Five weeks, three days and nine hours…give or take." Sam stared despondently at the floor.

Daniel fell back onto his legs. She was still counting in hours? This was way more serious than he thought.

In a flash of hind-sight the events of the last few weeks became crystal clear to him. No wonder things had seemed so strained and they had been so ill-tempered. They were both hurting and intent on punishing themselves for their so-called indiscretion. Frankly Daniel wondered how they'd lasted so long before giving in to each other. Maybe this wasn't all over just yet, maybe he could turn them around. Sam didn't have to leave. He could help them sort this out.

"No Daniel, don't even think about it, I've made my decision." She'd been watching and had seen the idea forming in his mind. "General O'Neill hasn't declined my request and I don't think he's going to, so please don't start Daniel."

"General O'Neill? His name is _Jack_ and he is one of your closest friends, he's more than that, you love him."

"Dan-niel." Sam whined, she wasn't sure she could handle a full-on Daniel assault.

"No Sam, you come over here and you drop this bombshell on me and then you expect me to just take it? No, I don't think so. I'm gonna do everything in my power to stop this from happening. There's no way on this earth…or any other planet for that matter…that I am going to just stand by and watch you walk away from the best thing in your life. In fact I'm going to call Jack and tell him this is all bullshit and that he can't let you go because you guys finally got it together. No way." He pushed to his feet and plucked his cell phone off the charge. Sam was up in an instant and across the room after him.

"No Daniel, wait, you can not call him, I won't have it. This is between you and me right now. Besides it's not something you can just mention over the phone."

"Why not Sam, why can't I?" Daniel was obstinately holding the phone up out of Sam's reach.

She sighed and stomped her feet. "Because it'll get us both court-marshalled that's why!" She blurted like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Daniel suddenly deflated. "Oh, I forgot about that. Okay so I won't tell him over the phone. I am still going to call him though, invite him to dinner. You're coming too by the way, we're going to sort this out." He wandered away from Sam and into the kitchen as the phone began to ring.

Carter sank down the wall by the door, this was the last thing she needed. She dropped her head into her hands and let the pent up tears fall. She knew Daniel was going to be difficult but she hadn't expected him to not listen to a word she said and call the damned General. She was never going to get away now. Why hadn't she just stuck to the plan and made an excuse about needing a change of pace. Oh for the love of Pete this had all gone so horribly wrong.

"There it's done, he's coming round at eight…Sam?" She was a tiny ball on the floor. He moved across the room towards her. "Hey, hey Sam don't cry. It'll be alright I promise."

"No Daniel it won't be, things will never be alright again. I can't do this. I can't talk to him about this. I tried..." Giant rolling sobs stole away her words.

Daniel slid down the wall beside his friend and attempted to wrap his arms around her. "You can try again, I'll be there this time, I'll make him see sense, just you wait." She pulled violently away from him.

"Don't you see Daniel I don't want him to see sense. I want to get as far away from all this as I can. I need him to let me go, I need _you_ to let me go. I can't deal…" Sam choked on her own words. "I have to get away." she tried again. "I have to get out of here. I can't stay any longer. It's the right thing to do. If I stay we'll both get into trouble and I can't have that. I have to be alone. Oh god what am I talking about. I'll never be able to get away, no matter where I go I'll never be alone again." She began to wail loudly.

Daniel had no idea what she was rambling about but he'd had enough. He couldn't put her through any more. "Okay, okay Sam. Whatever you want. We'll do whatever you want, come here." He pulled her close, this time she didn't resist. She buried her face in his chest and he encouraged her to cry as freely as she liked. "Let it out Sam, just let it all out. I'm here, I'm right here." He soothed as she pounded her fists against his chest.

* * *

**AN: Okay I think I'll leave it there. I was going to post another chapter but I think that's enough to be getting on with for now. Besides I'm knackered and trying to work on another story at the same time...**

**Daniel needs some advice next, hmm, I wonder who Danny would turn to..?**


	10. Unwanted Advice

**AN: Okay firstly to clear up any misunderstandings over my terminology in chapter 6. Duty Calls, I make reference to Jack thinking of Daniel as a pansy. What I mean by 'pansy' is weakling not that he thinks he's gay, that would be out of character for this story…hope this helps :) **

**Two slightly shorter but more intense chapters coming up…**

* * *

9. UNWANTED ADVICE

* * *

After an hour of solid crying Sam had finally fallen asleep in Daniel's arms. Totally exhausted she hadn't even stirred as he placed her on his bed, made her more comfortable and covered her over. He was now wandering in tight circles around his living room. There was only one person he could call about a thing like this, so after checking that Sam was still out, he closed the bedroom door and dialled Janet's direct line.

"_Doctor Frasier."_

"Oh hi Janet, it's Daniel?"

"_Da-aniel. What can I do for you?"_ He could hear the smile in her voice. He sighed and pulled off his glasses.

"I'm sorry Janet but I've got Sam here. She's very distressed and I don't quite know what to do?" He hadn't intended to be so blunt but the whole situation was getting to him. Sam was not prone to emotional outbursts and he really didn't know how to handle her when she was having a meltdown. Jack's meltdowns were easy. You just hung around in the room and let him punch things, preferably not people, until he came back out of it. As for Teal'c? Well he didn't melt, he didn't even frazzle. He just did the whole Jaffa revenge thing and it was best to stay well out of that one if you could. Doctor Frasier sighed on the other end of the line.

"_Ah, okay. Where is she now?"_

"She's asleep. She cried for like a full hour Janet and I don't really understand what's going on, I know it must be something huge to make her this upset. She was rambling something about being alone and never being alone again. Seriously Janet I could not get any sense out of her. Do you have any idea what's the matter with her?" There had to be more going on, Daniel was sure of it.

"_Daniel I…"_ The ensuing silence belied the fact that Janet knew more about the situation than she was prepared to let on. _"Um, what exactly did she tell you?"_

Daniel threw himself onto the sofa and rubbed his forehead. He was still too emotional to think straight. "I don't know Janet. She said…she told me about what happened after the last team night." Daniel tugged on his upper lip, he wasn't at all sure if this was a good idea, there was no way of knowing how much Sam had told Janet, if anything, about what had happened.

"_About her and…"_ Janet stopped talking.

"Jack? Yeah she told me about them finally get-"

"_Da-aniel!"_ Frasier hissed urgently on the other end. The line wasn't secure. _"We can't talk about that now! Look I'm up to my eyes here with SG-13 but I'll call over later and we'll talk. In the meantime just let her sleep, god knows she needs it. And when she does wake up try to get her to eat something, I'm not entirely sure she's been doing that either."_

"Ah sure thing Janet, I'll make her a sandwich or something. Jack's coming over later for dinner so she should still be here, maybe you wanna come over then too and we can sort this whole mess out."

"_The General is coming over? At what time? Does Sam know?"_

Daniel was momentarily stunned by her frantic tone. "Around eight, and yes Sam knows. It's kinda what started the whole crying thing…I think."

"_No, no, no Daniel. You gotta ring and cancel the General. It's not a good idea for him to be around her at the moment."_

"Wha-at? Janet are you crazy? I can't just ring and un-invite the man to dinner! Besides the whole point of having him over is to open up a dialogue so we can sort this whole thing out." Daniel was convinced that Janet had lost her mind.

"_We-ee." _The emphasis on the word had him sure she was gesturing between them._ "Can't sort anything out Daniel. It's not up to us. Forcing this now is not going to help. It's only going to push her further away. It's bad enough that she's…" _again Janet paused.

Momentarily perplexed by her abrupt cessation, Daniel realised that he had not told Frasier that he knew she was leaving. "It's okay Janet I know she's put in for reassignment. Not that Jack will let her go. Not if he has any sense that is."

"_Oh he'll let her go, believe me. I've tried talking to him about it...Not that at the moment I'm starting to think that might not be such a bad thing."_

Daniel nearly dropped the phone. "Janet Frasier you cannot be serious? You think it's a good idea to just let her run away?"

"_She's not running away Daniel."_

"Sure as hell seems like it to me."

Janet sighed down the phone. _"Listen to me. Like I said, I can't talk now but you've got to cancel the General or at least get Sam out of there before he arrives. The last thing she needs right now is any more stress and being around Jack O'Neill is definitely going to stress her out."_

Daniel hesitated. "Well, I'll see Janet, but I don't like it and I still don't know what's really going on. I know there's more than you're telling me and I am going to find out what it is."

"_Just be gentle Daniel. Sam needs a lot of support right now. Don't argue with her over her decision to go. It was really hard for her to make that choice and she really believes she's doing the right thing."_

"The right thing? Janet, what are you talking about?"

Daniel was aware of the rise in the doctor's aggravation levels as she practically bit his head off down the phone_. "Look Daniel, just don't upset her anymore. If you stress her out and make her ill over the head of this I will never forgive you. Now promise me you will leave this alone."_

"Janet I…"

"_Promise me Daniel."_

The doctor's tone was non-negotiable. "Okay, okay, I promise."

"_Good. I'll speak to you later." _There was a pause. _"I'm sorry Daniel but I really do have to go."_

The line went dead but not before Daniel heard the infirmary alarms going off and someone calling her name. Belatedly he realised he had not asked what was wrong with SG-13. Whatever it was it didn't sound too good. He made a mental note to ask Jack later.

**

* * *

**

AN: My favourite part of the story is coming up next…even if I do say so myself ;)


	11. Reawakening

**AN: Your reviews are awesome guys, thank you so much...enjoy.**

* * *

10. REAWAKENING

* * *

Sam rolled over and smiled, her dreams taking her to wonderful places. Unconsciously her hand drifted down and rested over her stomach. She murmured incoherently before uttering Jack's name. Something tugged on her senses and instantly she was awake, her dreams shattering away from her and out of the reach of memory.

Sitting bolt upright in the bed it took her a moment to figure out where she was. At first she really didn't know, it had been ages since she'd last set foot in Daniel's bedroom but gradually it all slipped into place. His clutter, her tan boots by the door and the recollection of her tears. He must have carried her in here after she had cried herself to sleep. Sam rubbed at her face and her head mortified that she had actually fallen apart so dramatically. Damned hormones, how dare they get the better of her!

She wanted to sit on and nurse her dented pride but the need to pee was winning out, it was probably what woke her in the first place, so she shoved her feet over the side of the bed. She shivered as she contemplated just how frugal Daniel was with the heating…no, not frugal. Her face burned as she realised she was wearing nothing but her bra, thin strappy top and her panties. Her jeans and sweater were folded neatly on the chair by the window.

Looking around, she huffed out a breath as she realised the room wasn't en-suite. Of course it wasn't, like Daniel would ever fork out extra money just so he could have a place with a bathroom twelve steps closer than the one down the hall. Pushing away the irrational ill temper at the man who had been very kind to her, she dragged herself unwillingly across the room. She didn't bother putting on her jeans as Daniel had seen it all before.

Vaguely she wondered what time it was as she carefully eased the door from the latch, she was trying hard not to make any noise, she didn't feel ready to talk to anyone just yet. Releasing a breath she didn't know she was holding she scooted quickly out, intent on making a dash for the loo.

"Jack!" She squeaked as she came face to face with the echo of her dreams and her waking nightmare.

"Carter!" He strained out.

Jack felt his face flush and his entire being tightening to the point of strangulation. What the hell was she doing her? And in Daniel's bedroom? That made no sense.

Sam knew she was bright red and watched Jack turning the same colour. Panic began to set in and she was acutely aware of her lack of attire and bed-hair. It was entirely illogical to worry about her hair when she was wandering around in her underwear but her hands went instantly to try and flatten it down anyhow. She fish-mouthed a few times and stiffly pointed in the direction of the bathroom.

Totally incomprehensive of anything but her blue eyes, Jack just stood and stared. Eventually he caught on to the fact that she was trying to leave and took half a step backwards. Naturally his heel caught the edge of one of Daniel's many boxes and he lost his balance. Carter caught his arm as he tilted off to the left and pulled a little too hard. He overcorrected and careered into her.

Suddenly they found themselves body to body as his weight pinned her up against the wall. Neither of them dared move as the sensation of closeness drove electricity up and down through them, raising their heart rates and arresting their breathing. Jack's hand came down onto her almost bare shoulder as he looked deep into her eyes.

"Are you okay?" He whispered, his voice catching just a little.

Marginally she nodded, acutely aware that his fingertips were now brushing her skin. She swallowed hard as that ever so personal tingle awoke within her. She felt the heat rising. It caused her to squirm and then still completely.

Jack thought he might just die altogether as she moved her body just ever so slightly up along his own. Instinctively he pressed a little closer, completely unable to control himself. The heat of her body, especially her thigh up against the inner edge of his own, was stealing his sanity. He knew he should move away but god how could he?

Sam's fingers splayed as they registered his broad back. She was losing all sense of perspective. How long had they been here now? It couldn't have been more than a few seconds but it felt like centuries, wonderful skin melting centuries. He sighed onto her neck and she shivered at the sensation, slipping further. "Jack?" She whispered, her eyes closing.

"Mmm?" He asked, completely lost within her world. Heaven help him he wanted to kiss her.

Sam kept her eyes shut. She knew the minute she opened them she would be a gonner. He was pressing fully against her now and she could feel the stirring of his desire. It was too much, he was too much. She was going to have to give in...

**

* * *

**

AN: Now don't get too excited, I told you at the start this was not strictly a ship. Remember that guy with the worst timing in the world? Yep you guessed it…

Unfortunately due to life getting in the way there is a high possibility that I will be away for the next two days. Where I'm headed is so remote that there is no internet, so I will be unable to post. But I will get 'Honesty' up asap.


	12. Honesty

**AN: Got back a little early so thought I'd squeeze in one chapter tonight.**

* * *

11. HONESTY

* * *

Jack's soldier instincts were still strong so the moment it happened he was aware. Daniel tried to back-pedal down the hall but it was too late. Two heads flicked in his direction. Jack bounced from the wall and Sam slipped under his arm and disappeared. Still captivated Jack watched her until she was completely out of sight, the image of her in panties burning a hole into his mind. His blood pressure was still definitely cranking an eleven out of ten, he could hear the rush of it in his ears. Why the hell had he not just kissed her when he had the chance?

Turning slowly he just stared at the red-faced archaeologist who stood awkwardly before him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know I was interrupting." The man stammered, just the hint of amusement on his face.

Jack ignored him. "Why the hell didn't you tell me she was here?" O'Neill raged, trying to keep his voice low. He took two full steps towards the man.

Daniel's body strung wire tight as Jack moved threateningly in on him. "She was asleep. I didn't think you…I didn't think she…"

"Yeah you didn't think. That sounds about right. What the hell is she doing here, and in your bed?" He knew that it was a ridiculous accusation but still he couldn't stop the flare of jealousy.

Daniel found his mind clicking into overdrive. Janet had been right this was a very bad idea. Jack was going to explode and Sam would probably never come out of the bathroom again. "She called round earlier. She wanted to tell me about leaving in person. She got a little upset and fell asleep so I put her in my room, that's all." Daniel felt like a schoolboy confessing to stealing a math answer book, it was insane, he hadn't done anything wrong.

Jack's whole demeanour changed. "She got upset?" He looked longingly down the hall, worry tugging through him. "What about? You didn't give her a hard time did you?" He was back to glaring at Daniel.

"No, no of course not Jack." Daniel blurted automatically, feeling more than a little guilty about the fact that he had. "She doesn't actually want to leave you know." He told his friend, trying to steer the conversation in the right direction.

There was a loud whistling sound in Jack's ears. "What do you mean she doesn't want to leave?" He looked the archaeologist straight in the eye. She had made a damned convincing case to him.

"Oh come on Jack! She's only leaving because she thinks she has to." Jack shook his head like he didn't understand. Daniel's temper rose up, how could someone so smart be so thick? "Because of what happened…on the team night…a month ago…between you and her." Finally a light turned on.

"Oh-h, so you know about that huh?" Jack flushed red.

"Yes I know, Sam told me this afternoon."

"She assured me that her leaving had nothing to do with that." Jack found himself in deep denial of his friend's words. "She said she needed a change of pace, something more academic."

"And you believed her." Daniel's shoulders fell. Sadness tugged at him. It was obvious how much Jack cared for Sam if he was willing to just let her go.

"Yeah I believed her." He leaned against the wall completely **depressed**. "I mean I wanted to. It was easier. It makes sense that she wants more out of her career than just shooting alien bad guys…cool as that is. You know she's spent more time in the lab these last few months than out in the field. She _is_ the unofficial head of the science department after all. I even offered to make it official but it wasn't enough." Jack's knees were getting weak so he pushed off the wall and wandered into the living room. Daniel followed him and handed him a beer from off the table. "Why would I not believe her? It's not like I _want_ to be the reason she's leaving. Hell I want to be the reason she stays."

The last part of his sentence was barely audible but Daniel was sure he had heard right. He dropped down beside his friend. "Well Jack, if you want to be the reason she stays you gotta _be_ the reason."

Jack scratched his head. Damn Daniel and his cryptic nature. Then he shrugged. Turns out he wasn't being so cryptic, he was stating the obvious. "It's not that simple Daniel."

"How much more simple could it be?"

Jack took a slug of beer and turned his face away. "There's the frat regs for a start."

"Oh bull, Jack! You've been using that as an excuse for years. Open your eyes man."

Jack's eyes bored angrily into Daniel's. "It's not an excuse, it's a fact! You think I like torturing myself with her presence every day, knowing I can't have her? You don't think I haven't exhausted every avenue possible to try and find a way around the rules so that we can be together? I even tried to retire but they wouldn't accept it. I mean Jesus Christ Daniel, I love the woman for crying out loud." Daniel's eyes went wide. It spurned Jack on. "That's right I said it. I, love, Samantha, Carter!" He was yelling now at the top his lungs.

"Shh Jack, she'll hear you."

Jack shook his head and started to laugh. Suddenly he was on his feet, still yelling. "I don't care! I want her to hear me! In fact I'm going to go in there right now and tell her that I love her." Jack ignored his beer as it fizzed and rolled over the neck of the bottle and onto the floor.

"No Jack you can't do that." Inexplicably Daniel was up and grabbing his arm. After eight years of trying to get them together he was now actively holding him back, preventing him from doing the one thing that made the most sense in the world.

"Why not? Let go of me." The bottle hit the deck.

"Because Jack if you tell her now you better have a plan to follow through. You go rushing in there telling her how you feel but you can not do anything about it because of "_regulations"_ you are gonna crush her into tiny little pieces. You didn't see her earlier Jack." Daniel was on the verge of tears. "She was totally broken. I've never seen anything like it. She cried non-stop for over an hour. I didn't know what to do." He ran his fingers through his hair and turned away.

Jack felt like his world was turning upside-down. "We agreed that we couldn't be together." Daniel twisted back, trying to keep up with the jump in conversation. "We decided that neither of us could give up our jobs, it would only lead to resentment. I had kinda hoped now that she was transferring to Washington that we could finally be together. But then I read the letter and I knew it was all over. That it was too late."

"I'm sorry Jack but I don't know what you mean?"

Jack tossed his friend a guarded look. "Well you read it didn't you? It was pretty clear."

Daniel was shaking his head. "No Jack I never read it. Sam found it before I had the chance."

"Sam knows I gave it to you!" The whistling sound was back as Jack sank down the wall onto the floor. "Aw crap!"

"What? What's so bad about me seeing her reassignment request?" Daniel was totally bewildered.

From the floor, his head down, fists twisted up into his hair, Jack talked through his knees. "It wasn't just her reassignment request. There was a second letter in there…a private one. Something no-one else should have ever seen. God, I feel like such a bastard betraying her trust like that."

Daniel's attention was fixed on the table. He wandered over to it and pick something up. Jack didn't bother following his movements, he was too busy stomping on his own insides.

"Well here, you better have it back then." He said gently as he came down onto his hunkers and reached the envelope across to his friend.

Jack stared disbelievingly at the folded piece of parchment. "You still have it? But I thought…" Tentatively he took the precious document.

"She dropped it when she started crying." Daniel couldn't hold his friend's eye any longer, the whole thing was just too sad. "She was sitting exactly where you are actually."

Jack thought he might just break into tiny pieces as he listened to Daniel speak. He pulled the letter close to his heart and fought hard against the lump in his throat and the sting at the back of his eyes. He had no idea where all this emotion was coming from. All he knew was he could not stand the thought of Samantha Carter in floods of tears all because of him.

"Daniel I need a moment." He whispered.

"No problem Jack. I'll go check on Sam." He compassionately patted his best friend's knee and rose away from him. Jack didn't ask for time very often and so it was important to give it to him.

**

* * *

**

AN: Next chapter is 'Escape'. Will throw it up tomorrow night.


	13. Escape

**AN: Just one chapter tonight, last night was a late one, many owies :( so might be a few mistakes. Thanks for all the reviews, you're opinion means a lot to me BTW.**

* * *

12. ESCAPE

* * *

Sam found herself still stuck in the bathroom. For what felt like ages she had stood banging her head off the mirror. How the hell had she been so stupid as to allow herself to end up in such a compromising position? All she'd tried to do was stop him from falling over and instead they had ended up wrapping themselves around each other, and in front of Daniel too. There was no telling how long the man had actually been standing there before the General had noticed him, maybe he'd seen the whole thing. She supposed it didn't matter now that he knew about what had happened between them…no that wasn't true, for some reason that made it worse.

Little tremors were still running through her. God, the General was so hot. She couldn't believe she'd actually called him Jack! That had got to be a first…well not really, but it was certainly the first time he had not corrected her or had had to ask to be called by his first name. Memories of her time on the Prometheus stole over her. She'd called him Jack when she'd woken up in the infirmary back at the SGC. He hadn't been very happy about that. She was glad he'd decided it was the concussion talking. Truth be told it was far from it. It was saying that word that caused her to fully comprehend what she was missing out on. In that very moment everything became crystal clear. Her "father" on the ship had been right, she was simply content. It was never going to be enough, not any of it if she couldn't have Jack.

Sam tipped her head back and laughed ironically to herself. She _had_ had Jack and that had just made things a whole heck of a lot worse. If she'd just been able to show a little restraint then at least she could have remained content instead of utterly miserable. The trouble was there was no such thing as restraint when it came to Jack O'Neill…not anymore. Not after realising how she really felt. Hell she'd even pretty much stopped going on missions so she could hang around him.

And now..?

Now she had lost everything because she hadn't been careful enough to begin with. Maybe if they had used protection she could have actually gotten past all this. But Jack's baby was already growing inside her and everything was changing. She dabbed at the tear in the corner of her eye. Despite the fact that she felt the loss of Jack more acutely than ever after their latest entanglement she wouldn't cry, not again.

Sam drew up her strength, she couldn't hide in here forever. Sure there was no way on this earth that she was going to hang around in a room with only Jack and Daniel but she needed to get back to the bedroom to get dressed so that she could escape. Steeling herself she opened the door just a crack. They were in the living room. She could hear them talking in serious tones but couldn't make out their words. Her heart gave a little skitter as she pushed out into the hallway. Silently she edged closer to her destination.

Just as she reached the bedroom door she heard the words that made her soul scream with joy and rip itself apart simultaneously. _"I love the woman for crying out loud…I love Samantha Carter." _The rest of his words disappeared into the great valley that opened up inside of her. Jack loved her? He actually loved her. She couldn't quite take it in. Deep down she'd always known that it was true but to actually hear him say the words out loud, that was not something she'd never expected.

There was a scuffling and something hit the deck. Sam was in through the door like a shot. Whatever she did she couldn't let on that she had heard him. It would make leaving impossible. Pain tore through her at the new revelation that it was going to be infinitely harder to go now that she knew for sure he felt the same as she did. Maybe Janet was right, maybe she was making a huge mistake.

The damned tears were back as she stepped into her clothes. She couldn't help it, the whole thing was just too much to bear. How was she ever going to manage to get out of the flat without Daniel making a scene if she was crying? Besides it's not like she could just walk past Jack in floods of tears and not expect him to react. One look of concern from him and she would fold like a card house in a hurricane.

"Damn-it Sam pull yourself together. You can't stay and you can't have him. He'll end up disgraced and without a career if you stay. You don't want that for him, or for yourself." Saying it out loud didn't help. There was still a huge part of her that selfishly and irrationally wanted Jack O'Neill no matter what the cost. "Too bad." She muttered at her refection in the mirror. God she looked like shit.

A knock on the door caused her to squawk out loud. Her eyes darted around the room as that trapped rabbit feeling came over her.

"Sam, can I come in?"

It was Daniel. Of course it was Daniel. The General would never dare intrude on her under these circumstances. "Sure." She found herself saying even though her mind was screaming no. She just wanted to be left alone but this was his house and she was standing in his bedroom. She wiped her face clean with her hand.

Daniel head popped round the frame and he slipped in closing the door behind him. Sam was standing in the middle of the room looking totally devastated. His heart went out to her.

"Please don't feel sorry for me Daniel." She could see the pity in his eyes and it made her feel terrible.

"I'm sorry Sam I… Jack needs some time alone." He said, changing the subject.

Sam just nodded. After his revelation it was hardly surprising. The chances were Jack O'Neill hadn't even admitted to himself how he was feeling. It wasn't his style. He was much more of an ignore-the-subject-until-it-goes-away-or-pick-on-Daniel-till-he-shuts-up-about-it kind of guy.

Things were awkward in the room and the tension was growing. "Daniel can you grab my boots for me please." Sam asked purely to break the tension.

"Ah yeah sure, they're right here. I brought them in with the rest of your stuff after you fell asleep. I hope you didn't mind that I took your jeans off. I just thought you'd be more comfortable." He handed them over noticing her puffy eyes for the first time as he stepped closer.

"No it was fine. I should thank you actually, you've been very kind." She turned away from him and headed for the chair. Again she was fighting the water works. It was so unlike her.

"Erm, no problem, what are friends for?" There was no warmth in his quiet words, just more pity and concern. He knew she was close to bursting again and it made her want to run to him. Thankfully the doorbell rang and after a moments hesitation he left to answer it.

* * *

The door flew open.

"Oh Janet thank god you're here. You were right, I'm such an idiot."

Janet's already haggard features fell. "Why what did you do?" she accused as she stepped through the door.

Daniel had the gumption to look totally ashamed. "It wasn't entirely my fault. Sam was still asleep and Jack arrived early now Jack is in the kitchen killing my best bourbon and Sam is hiding in the bedroom. Maybe you should go in and see her?" Daniel ushered Janet towards the hallway.

She pulled free from him, her anger cranking up a notch. She had had one hell of a day and this was all she needed. "For god sake Daniel! I told you not to let this happen. How is she? Had a nervous breakdown yet?" Her tone was about as acid as you could get. It stuck Daniel to the floor. When he didn't answer she rolled her eyes and cursed a blue streak at him under her breath. The man was as useless as a waterproof teabag sometimes. "I'll go check on her. You go get Jack out of the bourbon bottle, but keep him in the damn kitchen till we get out of here. Lord knows how we're gonna deal with this." She headed for the bedroom door then spun back on him. "You know you are just…why can't you just keep your damned nose out sometimes Daniel Jackson." She took half a step back towards him but changed her mind. "I'll deal with you later."

Daniel was stung. He was about to protest at how unfair the doctor was being, telling her that Sam had come to him and that it wasn't his fault she'd still been asleep when Jack had arrived but she was gone. Besides he'd already said all that and somehow it was still his fault. Well screw you Janet Frasier, that's the last time I ask for your help.

* * *

Janet was in through the door and at Sam's side before the woman even knew she was there. Sam had collapsed over the side of the chair and onto the floor as soon as Daniel had left.

"Janet is that you?" She asked. She could see nothing but a vague blurry outline that definitely wasn't Daniel.

"Yeah it's me. Come on I'm taking you home. Where's your other boot?"

Sam didn't care about her other boot so she didn't bother to answer. Her friend was here and everything was going to be okay. She wasn't quite sure why she told herself that but she believed it. Wiping her eyes she blinked a few times as Janet came down to her level and handed her a tissue. "Come on honey, let's get you out of here."

Sam nodded and blew her nose. Instantly she felt better and accepted the errant footwear that was on offer from her best friend. "I don't know what's wrong with me Janet. I just can't stop crying."

"It's not you Sam it's the hormones. Come on we'll talk about it in the car." She extended her hand and Sam took it, grateful for the help in getting to her feet. She leaned in on Janet, craving the comfort that she offered as she swept her arm around the taller woman's waist, preparing to lead her quickly from the room and out into the street.

Once they crossed into the living room Daniel appeared out of the other door. "Oh you're leaving already."

"Yes Daniel we're leaving." Sam looked round surprised at Janet's tone. Daniel was wearing his smacked puppy face and Janet had gone ramrod straight at her side. What the hell was that all about?

"Oh well, take care Sam and I'll call you real soon I promise." Daniel almost looked like he was scared to say anything more.

"Bye Daniel." Jibed the doctor.

"See ya." Sam voiced, just a hair above a whisper, she wasn't even sure if he'd heard her. It seemed Janet was in a huge rush to get out of the building.

"Sam wait."

Sam felt her heart being ripped in two and she pulled away from Janet to turn and look. Jack was standing in the kitchen doorway clinging to a bottle of whiskey or something similar. He swayed a little.

"Not now Jack, this is not the time." Janet interjected.

"But I have to…" His voice trailed off in favour of a look. Carter felt her heart burst. She knew exactly what he was trying to say, it was exactly the look she had been dreading all night. It quite clearly said I'm sorry I've hurt you and I'll always love you. His eyes were filled with the same regret as they had been on that god-awful ship when the bracelets fell off and they thought they were going to die. One other thing was perfectly clear, he was letting her go. She moved half a step towards him but Janet stopped her.

"No Sam. We have to go." She whispered gently. Sam looked back as her friend led her away. Jack was standing with Daniel hand braced to his chest. It seemed he wasn't allowed to act either. Why were their friends doing this to them?

**

* * *

**

AN: *sigh* and that's another chapter down, 'Janet's Day' is next, a bit of a break from all the angsty stuff, don't know about you but I need it! )


	14. Janet's Day

**AN: And now as promised a little light relief…**

* * *

13. JANET'S DAY

* * *

The car journey home was an entirely quiet affair. Janet pulled into Sam's driveway and got out. She took the woman inside and insisted that she sit down. She then set about making her something to eat. Sam didn't feel hungry but she hadn't the heart to argue. She picked at her plate until Janet scolded her, reminding her that the baby needed regular food. That finished her off, she couldn't touch another bite whether she wanted to or not. She dropped her fork onto the plate.

"Sam, did you hear me? I said-"

"Yeah I heard you Janet but I'm just not hungry. Leave it there and I'll heat it up tomorrow or later or something. Don't you think it's time you were leaving?" She wasn't trying to be cruel, she was just tired again.

Janet's eyebrows flicked up slightly. "Sam I'm not going anywhere. Number one, you are in no condition to be left alone tonight and number two, I've been awake now for forty one hours. I couldn't drive home even if I wanted to. Your spare room is going to be just fine."

"Forty one hours? What happened that you didn't get any sleep?" Sam was frowning at her friend. All of her self pity had completely evaporated.

Janet sighed and sat down beside her friend as they moved to the couch. "Well remember how my phone rang when I was here with you last night…god was that really only last night? Anyhow it turns out that SG-13 have only gone and got themselves shot in the ass with poisoned arrows." Sam grimaced, she knew exactly how that felt. "How that team ever got the title "Covert Ops" I'll never know, they're about as covert as a giant in a field of pygmies.

Sam laughed. That was about as accurate a description as you were going to get. It had only been a year since Wells had got himself, Janet and the then Colonel all shot up. Damn they were lucky they all had that new armour on. Wells called his baby daughter after Janet owing to the fact that she saved his life. She was also the child's godmother, a fact that never ceased to make the woman smile. How different things could have been. Sam couldn't imagine her life without Janet in it. "So I take it they swelled up?" She asked taking her mind of the grim subject it had wandered on to.

"Oh yeah, you could say that. I had to fill them full of enough medication to take down an elephant just to get them stabilised. So I get them all sorted out and am working on a proper antidote when the base klaxons go off again. This time it's SG-3 with a broken collar bone and busted ankle, landslide. Doctor Warner was already in emergency surgery with one of the day crew canteen workers who collapsed with a ruptured appendix so I have no choice but to patch up the boys and just hope that the culture I was preparing didn't grow a mind of it's own and wander off the base, 'cause you never can tell with alien plant life…as well you know."

Sam did. She nodded, completely fascinated by the day that she'd missed on the base.

"So SG-3 are all sorted out and away when Siler arrives with a busted noggin, fell out of the armoury store closet…again. Man alive, how he does that I'll never know. Three stitches and a mild concussion later he is back on duty saying it's nothing, same old Siler. Anyway to cut a long story short I finally get back to the culture and it _has_ overtaken half the base…well the complete isolation chamber anyhow. So I call the hazmat team in and have to start again. The only good thing being at least I know it'll take no time to grow what I need to cure Dixon and Balinsky, who by this time are really starting to complain about the itching and stretching of their skin. By this stage it's already the afternoon and I'm on the go for over well over thirty hours so I just want to fill them full of tranquilizers and get on with it."

"Thirty hours, how come?"

Janet blinked at her friend. "I was on six to six the day before and came straight over here once I was done. I was still awake when the phone rang at after four in the morning and I'd just finished with SG-13 before I went over to Daniel's. So like I said, thirty hours at that stage, forty one hours over all and counting."

"God Janet, stop talking and go get some sleep then. How you don't look like a walking zombie I don't know."

"Thank you sweetie but I know exactly what I look like. I'm nearly done, do you want to hear the end of the story or not?"

"There's more!" Sam grinned, she couldn't believe it.

"Oh yeah, there's more. So I try Balinsky with the first round of antidote. Everything is fine for a while and I'm talking to Daniel on the phone but I've made a big mistake, seems this damn thing only gets worse when you try to fight it off. Balinsky goes down, crash-cart gets dragged in, it's really touch and go for a while, then out of the blue all his stats change and he's back to full health. Turns out all that is required is an electric shock, so I've done all that work and the guys have suffered for almost twelve hours for nothing."

"No-oo!"

"Ye-es, and to make matters worse, word gets out that Bosworth is going to zat Dixon so half the base turns out to watch the great and almighty Colonel get shot."

Sam was giggling wickedly. "I'll bet he loved that!"

Janet was flying high on the story and there was no stopping her. "Oh the boys in the tech lab went one better. They managed to McGuyver the security camera up to an external feed so the whole thing is being showed on every TV screen on the base. Even the team-leaders meeting in the briefing room gets interrupted with the live feed. Dixon is not going to be a happy camper when he finds out."

"He doesn't know!"

"Of course not! Who in their right mind is ever going to tell Dave Dixon that the whole base is laughing and pointing at him on a big screen. Even the Gen-" Janet drew up short, realising what she was about to say.

Sam threw her an irritated look. "You know, you can mention his name, I'm not going to fall apart or anything." It was apparent Janet wasn't too sure about that, which just annoyed Sam even more. "So even the General…" She continued for her.

"Right. So even General O'Neill isn't prepared to tell him. I reckon Bosworth will end up getting the short stick on that one. Or maybe Balinsky, as he's the only one who can genuinely say he didn't have anything to do with it saying as how he was asleep at the time."

"Oh man, how I wish I wasn't on leave. It's going to be fun around the base for a few days." Sam's heart suddenly sank as she remembered she wasn't going to be back at the base. Not in a few weeks, not ever probably. Once she was reassigned she wouldn't have clearance to be in Cheyenne Mountain any longer. Sure she'd probably still be contacted from time to time but she'd deliberately chosen an assignment that had virtually nothing to do with the SGC, it was the only way.

"Hey, hey, don't worry. I'll still keep you informed, even if I'm not supposed to."

Carter smiled, her friend was like a mind-reader. She squeezed back as Janet took her hand.

First one and then the other of the women yawned.

"Okay time for bed. Baby needs its rest." Janet informed her patient who very soon would not technically be her patient any more.

"So does its doctor. Spare room is already made up from last night. I pulled it together just in case you wanted to stay over."

"Fantastic! Because right now I think it would be way beyond me to make a bed. Can I get you anything else before I go?"

"Janet, this is my house. I'll be doing the getting."

Janet who had gotten to her feet placed a hand on her hip. "I don't think so, you've been through enough this past forty eight hours, you're on rest time only, so no running around. Which reminds me, I want to check your blood pressure before you lie down." She disappeared over into the corner and fished out her bag. "No protesting, arm, now."

Sam rolled her eyes. It seemed her doctor was never off duty.

Janet frowned as she counted the time. "It's a little high Sam, nothing to be overly worried about but I'll check again in the morning. It's important you look after yourself. This is a very delicate stage for you. In a few more weeks you can relax and do things a bit more normally but for the moment I want you to take it slow."

Sam nodded. She trusted Janet to give her good advice and she fully intended to take it. She knew what risks her friend was talking about and the thought of losing the baby scared her so much that it made her feel ill, which incidentally, was another new and almost constant feeling.

"Oh and one more thing Sam, I want to know if you feel headachey, dizzy or have cramps. I don't care what time of the day or night it is or how mild. I'm going to be here to look after you. Jolinar messed up your physiology pretty good so we don't quite know what we are dealing with."

"Janet please don't scare me. I don't want to be reminded of all the things that could go wrong."

Janet smiled. "I'm sorry hun, I'm just being a fussy Nelly, don't worry I'm sure everything will be just fine, it's probably just the sleep deprivation talking." With that she yawned again and took herself off to bed, grateful that she always carried a spare set of pj's in her medical bag. Who's over prepared now Cassandra Frasier? She thought to herself a smug grin on her face.

Sam sat up for a little while longer trying to sort through everything in her head. Janet's company had really lifted her and things didn't look nearly half as bad as they had done. They still weren't good but at least she could find a reason to smile again. That was definitely something she did not have this morning.

**

* * *

**

AN: Well I hope you enjoyed that, I love Janet :)


	15. Two Weeks And Eleven Weeks Precisely

**AN: Okay time to move things along…**

* * *

14. TWO WEEKS AND ELEVEN DAYS PRECISELY

* * *

It had been precisely sixteen hundred hours when Sam had entered his office and delivered the news that had destroyed his world and nearly three weeks later Jack was still undecided about what he should do. It was that time of day again and Jack had officially ran out of time. There was no-one he could talk to about it, no-one who would fully understand.

Daniel and he had reached an impasse over what the right thing to do was. If he had just read the letter he would have understood his dilemma, but he had refused because of Carter's reaction on the day that she had arrived unexpectedly at his flat.

He was right of course. It really was not something that he should ever have allowed anyone else to read. Sam had poured so many of her private feelings into those words and it was not right that he had let another person have access to that. Teal'c would keep them locked up inside of him there was no doubt about that, but still it had not been fair.

Lord how he wished the Jaffa was back already. He would tell him what to do. He would know. But Teal'c wouldn't be returning for another two days and it would take at least three to process the paperwork, so that meant he had to decide today.

The question now was which lot of paperwork should he send? His own letter of retirement sat alongside Carter's request. Maybe he should just send both and be done with it.

If they was any chance that they were going to be together Sam needed the SGC just as much as he did, there was no two ways about it. One of them staying and the other leaving was never going to work. They would only end up resenting each other. Maybe if both of them were out of the picture then things could work... No it was too risky to send both letters. They kept turning down his request to retire and it would arouse way too much suspicion over the reasons behind their simultaneous decisions. An official inquest would not help anyone.

The other option was to send neither letter but that was just cruel. Regardless of her motivations it was obvious that Sam was suffering under the current circumstances. Besides the only real reason he could find to justify holding her back was for his own selfish personal gain and he would never do that to her. The choice she had made was a huge step up for her and would put her on an even faster track for promotion. It may even lead to her taking command of the SGC one day…or Atlantis. He could not deny her that option, not if it was what she really wanted. And there was the rub. He just was not convinced it was what she wanted.

If she was really ready to move on then why had she become so upset at Daniel's place? The next day, while Jack nursed his hideous hang-over, the man had described what happened as a 'full-on meltdown'. As far as Jack was aware Samantha Carter had never had one of those in the eight years that he had known her. Daniel had also told him that Doc. Frasier had warned that too much stress was going to make her ill...

Maybe there was a clue to the fuller extent of Sam's source of distress in her medical file? Jack was now totally convinced that it was not just because they had slept together that she had melted. Tough as it was to deal with, it did not merit her extreme reaction.

He decided that a little snooping could not hurt. He was supposed to be going over the personnel files for the medical quarterly review anyway so why not start with SG-1? He usually did. He trawled through the pile of files on his desk looking for the one he wanted. Teal'c and Daniel's files came to hand easy enough but after a third search and a thorough check of the floor and surrounding area it was obvious that Carter's file was not with the rest. Jack cursed wondering what Janet was playing at.

She had totally turn-coated on her original position. She was now actively encouraging him to let Sam go. It was disconcerting. What could have changed so dramatically that she had switched sides?

Cassie had even let it slip that Janet had been staying over at Sam's house a lot lately. It was apparent that the girl had not been supposed to say anything so Jack had kept the information to himself so as to not get the teen in trouble.

Enough was enough.

There was obviously something in Sam's file if Frasier withheld it from him, so he was just going to have to go and get it. Determined to put all the pieces together he left to go find the good doctor. She had just started her shift and was no way she was going to deny him access to his own personnel's medical information.

* * *

Janet knew it was him even before he reached her door. She could tell by the urgency of his footfalls on the polished floor. She also knew exactly what he wanted. There was no time to escape and nowhere to hide so she dropped her head into her hands and waited for the knock on the door. He didn't even bother, he just walked straight in.

"Oh hi, General." She voiced, slowly pushing to her feet.

"Janet." The man said as he closed over the door. "Where is Major Carter's file?" He did not have the time or the inclination to beat about the bush.

Janet tried stalling for time. "I'm sorry, Sir?"

He narrowed his eyes at her. "I'm reviewing the personnel files for our quarterly meet and I need Carter's file."

"Oh didn't I give it to you, Sir?" Janet asked innocently, avoiding his eye as they both sat down opposite each other in her tiny office.

"No Doc, you did not. I have Teal'c and Daniel's of course but not Carter's. Why would that be?"

Oh boy, he was on to her big time. She had been hoping this wouldn't happen but it was not over yet, she had a few ideas up her sleeve for just this scenario. She tried her first tack. "Oh that's right, I thought maybe you wouldn't be needing it seeing as how she's asked for reassignment."

"That hasn't been approved yet Doctor and until it is…if it is, she's still an active part of SG-1 and I need her file."

Damn, option one… Failed and with a bad piece of news as well.

Option two…

"Okay Sir, it'll take me a while to pull it all together, I'll bring it to you later."

"No, Janet I want it now."

"But Sir, can't you start with one of the other teams and come back to SG-1?"

"No I can't SG-1 is one and one comes first. Carter is the leader of one so her file gets looked at first. It's always been that way." He settled back into his chair determined that he was not going anywhere. Janet read him clearly.

Option two… Failed.

That left her clinging to option three, a highly risky strategy that might just work…

Slowly Janet reached into her drawer and pulled out Sam's file. Reading the name she passed it across to him and watched him do the same. "There you go Sir, I think you'll find that's everything you need." She was very careful with her inflection. If she could just get him to buy the fact that he had obviously beaten her she might just get away with her plan. She threw him a small defeatist's grin but he was still wary of her.

Slowly he opened the file and flicked through the pages. It was definitely Carter's file and everything seemed to be in order, but still something did not quite feel right.

Janet thought she was going to have a heart-attack as he leafed through the pages. Please do not let him go right to the end, she begged whoever was in charge of justice in the universe.

Disaster…

"Doctor Frasier?" He closed the file, set it on the desk, clasped his hands together over it and leaned forward. "Do you want to tell me why the last two months are not included in this document?"

Frasier thought fast, this had got to be good if she was to salvage the situation. "Like I said, I wasn't finished preparing it. It'll take me a while to write up the last of it."

"Or you could just tell me now?" He met and held her gaze. She was wavering.

"Ahh, there's really nothing to tell, Sir." Oh god that was a direct lie, insubordination, he could finish her if he wanted to.

"Why the delay then?"

"Not anything to do with Sam Sir, I've had a lot on what with SG's-13, 3 and Siler…" Her words faded out as he shifted position, his eyes never leaving her own. She felt heat rising up her neck.

"That was over two weeks ago and there have been no more incidents since then. It has never taken you so long before." He left his implication hanging.

"No, that's correct Sir it hasn't, but the follow up has been slower than usual, especially with Dixon and Balinsky, Sir, they've got a few…issues to work through, Sir." She tried to hide the flinch that ran through her, digging this hole deeper and dragging other people down into it really was not helping.

"They seemed fine at the briefing this morning. You cleared them for duty last week did you not?"

"Yes Sir, I did. Just a few last minute loose ends, nothing that should put them in any danger, Sir." She shrugged dismissively, or at least she hoped it was dismissively.

"Ri-ight. I shall look out for them in their medical reports." He rose from his seat. She was lying to him, she'd never 'Sir-ed' him so much in her life. His anger was getting the better of him. "I want the rest of Carter's file on my desk in half an hour doctor. Is that clear?" He ordered sharply.

"Crystal, Sir." Janet pressed out as she walked him to the door.

She shut it behind him and let out a strangled sigh. That could not have gone any worse.

* * *

Sam had been sitting alone at home reading an article on early pregnancy and the changes the female body went through when the phone rang distracting her from a pretty scary piece of information about what the impending week nine could bring. Glad of the interruption she grabbed for the house phone and answered it without looking at the ID.

"Hello." She blustered.

"_Oh good Sam, you're awake."_

"Janet? What's up, what's wrong, oh god something's happened hasn't, you found out something about the baby, what is it, you can tell me." Sam was on her feet her heart hammering. Janet had taken some of her blood-work into the lab with her and Sam had spent the last hour trying not to worry about it. Her blood pressure was still high when if anything it should be low and what with the super-sickness and the increase in spotting…

"_No, no it's nothing like that. Those results aren't in yet."_

"Well what then?"

Frasier sighed down the phone_. "It's General O'Neill, Sam. He came by looking for your medical file. I stalled him as much as I could but he's ordered that I bring it to him within the next half hour. I just thought you should know."_

"Oh Janet, I'm so sorry, I should never have put this on you."

"_It's okay Sam I'm going to go ahead with the plan and not mention anything in your printed out file. Your official document on the computer cannot be changed but I can make up a new page on the training software for his report."_

"I don't know about this Janet, I'm still not sure."

"_It'll be fine, it's perfectly believable that you didn't know until after your ninth week and you were already away. So it shouldn't be a problem."_ Janet decided it was best not to mention the fact that her request still had not gone through. It would only upset her unnecessarily.

Sam bit her lip. Her friend was taking an awful risk for her. "What if he finds out?"

"_And how is he going to do that? I'm certainly not going to tell him, are you?"_

"God no Janet, why would I do that, I'm the one who wants this kept quiet."

"_Well okay then, no one else knows so there isn't a problem. I better get started, I just wanted to give you a heads up that it was happening. Now go eat some more crackers I can hear your stomach from here."_

Sam smiled, her insides were rumbling loudly but it was gas not hunger, not that her friend needed to know that of course. "Sure thing Janet, keep me posted."

"_Will do Sam, bye."_

"Bye Janet."

Sam put the phone down and let out an exasperated screech. Why could not he have waited just a few more days to go poking around in the medical files, then he would have no cause to look at hers. Jack O'Neill never did anything paper related on time, why did he have to choose now to start?

Sam decided that eating crackers was a good idea. She was just going to have ice-cream along with them that was all. Oh and maybe some watermelon, she moved quickly from the couch and groaned at her mistake, first she had to go throw up...again.

**

* * *

**

AN: So here we go, another short but key chapter coming up.


	16. A Tiny Detail

**AN: Keep the reviews coming people, you are brill :) Enjoy chapter 15 **

* * *

15. A TINY DETAIL

* * *

Janet clicked the print button and gathered up the new file. She had included all of the normal medical information with one huge omission that technically made the document fraudulent. Dishonourable discharge was the best outcome she could hope for if she got caught doing what she was doing.

Emptying her lungs she slipped the pages into their proper place and closed the folder over. Everything looked completely normal and she was sure this was going to work.

There was only one small problem. It was so tiny a detail that Janet did not even notice it. It was to be the key piece of information that would unravel everything.

On the bottom right hand corner of each of the new pages was a small footnote. It read...

"_This document is for training purposes only."_

* * *

Jack was morosely flicking through the file Janet had finally brought him. Everything was in order and there was nothing useful within it. In fact, according to this, Carter was in the best health of her life. Not even so much as a sniffle or a nail out of place.

Jack felt that was wrong because he was sure he had seen a prescription bottle in her lab before she had left. Maybe it had been an old one, he didn't think so though. Carter was way too organised to leave old medication lying around, but then again she had been clearing out her shelves, not that he knew why then.

He sighed sadly and let the file fall open on the first page. Tenderly he ran his finger over her picture. Pretty soon this would be all he had left of her. He could not deny her anything. He never could and so, he was going to lose her.

None of this made sense. There _had _to be something here. He turned to the last page again, determined to read between the very thin lines of Janet's words.

Every single word was perfect, too perfect, there were no clues. She had covered her tracks well and Jack slammed his fist on the desk. "Damn you Janet Frasier!" He exclaimed. Then his eye chanced upon something that did not ring true. It was the smallest of anomalies but it instantly gave him hope. He brought the page closer to take a better look. "For training purposes." He muttered his heart rate picking up. He flicked back a few pages just to make sure then he re-read the words.

He stood up, sat down, then stood up again. He grabbed his laptop and typed in a search. He entered his access code and forced out a curse. She had raised the classification, he needed a second code. "Walter!" He called urgently and headed for the door. He almost collided with the man as he hurried to respond to his superior's call. "Ah good, there you are. I need your access code to get into a file."

"Sir?" Asked the Chief Sergeant.

"It's a highly classified document, needs a second code." He rushed the man over to the blinking screen.

"Is something wrong, Sir?" He asked, obviously flustered by the General's haste.

"No, no nothing serious, I'm just in a bit of a hurry that's all." He motioned for the man to get to work.

"There you go Sir, the page is loading." Respectfully he moved away from the screen before the highly sensitive information appeared that would be no doubt above his pay grade.

"Thank you so much Walter, that will be all." He smiled widely when he realised he was actually being quite rude. "You're the best wing-man a guy could hope for around here." He compensated, slapping the man on the back.

"Yes Sir, ah, thank you, Sir." Walter was only too glad to be leaving the room. The General was acting strange again. He did that from time to time but Walter never really got used to it. It freaked him out and made him long for the cool and level headed General Hammond that he missed oh so much.

**

* * *

**

AN: So what do you reckon? Feedback on this one would be good. One more chapter (not the last) tomorrow night. 'Of Babies And Babble'


	17. Of Babies And Babble

**AN: Okay, firstly I really hate the title of this chapter,it feels a little contrived ,but I just can't think of anything better! So if anyone has any ideas...**

* * *

16. OF BABIES AND BABBLE

* * *

Jack sat and stared at the screen in disbelief. If he was to read the words a thousand times he was sure he still would not quite take in what he was seeing. One more time he tried.

"_URGENT MEDICAL UPDATES._

_No. of Personnel Status Changes for Medical Quarter 31:- 6._

_1 of 6: . S. Carter (F): _

_Current medical condition: Pregnant, 2-3 Weeks. _

_Recommendation: Remove from active off-world duty – effective immediately. _

_Updated: 17 Aug. SGC-MQ31. JF."_

Suddenly his upside down world righted itself and he knew not only what was going on but what he had to do. He locked out his computer and bolted from the room. The update had been put in place exactly two and a half weeks after their last team night. He had no doubt at all about everything now and there was no way he was going to allow her to do what she thought she was going to do.

"Cancel my everything. I'm gone for the rest of the day." He yelled at a bewildered Walter as his disappeared round the corner and into the elevator. A few of the button lights were on so he used his emergency card to bypass the stops. Two medics and Siler squashed into the corner as he blarged about apparently oblivious to their presence. Eventually he noticed them and apologised for his restlessness. They said nothing, merely opting to agree with him afraid that he was upset about something. When General O'Neill was upset, silence was the best option if you wanted to live, or so the general consensus of opinion said.

Jack forced out from the metal box before the doors were half open, jumped the security railing and tore out into the September rain.

The run to his Hi-Lux and the journey to her house had never seemed so long. Twice any onlookers would have thought he nearly wiped out other cars as he jumped red lights and give way signs. He didn't care about the fines just so long as he got there, besides driving a car was nothing compared to flying low over the mountains borders of Iraq/Iran at supersonic speeds, sometimes traffic laws were just too tight in this country.

Turns out he screeched to a halt outside her house in a record time of fifteen minutes. It was the longest fifteen minutes of his life. He did not even turn off the wipers, close his car door or stop to pick up his keys from the driveway as he tripped and stumbled his way up to her front door.

* * *

He did not even get the chance to knock before the door flew open and Sam stood before him. She knew he knew. She was wide eyed, dishevelled and in sweatpants. She was more beautiful than he had ever seen her.

For a few moments they just stared at each other.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He demanded as he stepped over the threshold.

"I couldn't Jack." Suddenly she felt very small.

He took in her full figure from head to toe. "Did you think I'd be mad or something?"

"Yes. No." She uttered, completely speechless beyond that.

In a heartbeat none of that mattered. "But you are?" He asked, she nodded. "And it's mine?" Again she nodded seemingly close to tears.

To her utter consternation his face broke out in the most spectacular grin she had ever seen. His arms swept around her and he lifted her of her feet swinging her around. "This is absolutely incredible Sam. I can't believe it. It's the best news ever!"

"No it's not." She grouched and pushed away from him as her set her back on her feet.

"What are you talking about?" He burbled and dropped to his knees. Unashamedly he pulled up her top and sought out her small swell. His fingers ran over the barely discernable bump. "Wow this is amazing. How far along are we, seven weeks?"

"Eight." She corrected, totally baffled by his behaviour. She tried to push his hands away from her but he would not have it. It seemed he was completely taken with her mid-riff.

"Eight weeks! Wow!" He brought his face closer to her and only stopped caressing her gently so that he could press his ear to her stomach.

Sam huffed out a breath, somewhat annoyed by the unexpected invasion of her personal space. "Jack, what the hell are you doing?" She asked, her hand riding on her hip.

"You know you still gotta be very careful at eight weeks." He looked up at her, his dancing eyes suddenly flashing with concern. "You're not out of the danger zone yet. Are you eating properly, getting lots of rest? Maybe you should sit down. I think you should sit down." He got up and pulled her by the hand across the room and placed her on the couch before darting about like a lunatic. "I'll make you something to eat. What would you like? Oh wait is this yours? Were you eating this when I arrived? The watermelon's good but not the ice-cream. Here you can have this back." He shoved the half eaten fruit into her hand.

"Ja-ack!" She whined, setting the fruit aside as he started to babble again.

He stopped short. "What, what's wrong? Don't you like it?" he asked, spotting the abandoned fruit. "Or is something wrong, you're not in any pain are you?" He scooted over to her and dropped to his knees grabbing at her hands.

"No I'm not in any pain and the fruit's fine." She pulled her hands free. "Would you just stop?"

"Why, what?" He could not stop grinning.

"Just stop it? Stop acting like a nut-bag, you're freaking me out."

"I'm not acting like a nut-bag, I'm happy."

"Well stop being so happy then." She tried, but her message wasn't getting through.

"What, no way! You and I are having a baby."

"Yes that's right we are. And you can't see the problem with that?"

"Problem, what problem could there be?" It was his turn to look at her like she was crazy.

She was speechless, was he really so caught up in all this that he could not see the obvious? Just then the phone rang and she ignored it in favour of staring Jack down to see if she could get him to see sense. The answer machine clicked on.

"_Hey this is Sam, I'm either a little busy or not in at the moment, you know what to do." _Be-eep.

"_Sam it's Janet, if you're there pick up. I think we might have a problem. The General left the SGC about twenty minutes ago. I think he might know about-"_

Sam practically fell over the coffee table to get at the phone before Janet said too much and got herself in trouble. "Yeah hello Janet…No the General is already here…That's right he knows…Yes…No…" She grunted as she picked herself up off the ground. "No not exactly…Look I can't talk now, I'll call you later, bye." She hung up before Janet could say anything else and tossed the phone back onto the table like it was made of lava.

The atmosphere had already changed.

Jack remained seated in the middle of the floor but he had fallen quiet. Janet's words echoing out across the room had brought some of the reality back home. There had been a lot of deception carried out recently and all in the name of stopping him from finding out he was going to be a father again. Pain crushed his heart. Slowly he turned where he sat and looked up at Sam who still stood on the other side of the table. "Why Sam?"

The conversation was back where it started.

Blowing out a breath she came round to him and dropped down to sit directly in front of him. For a few minutes they just sat there, face to face, watching each other. Eventually Sam found her voice. "I don't exactly know why Jack. I suppose I didn't want to get you into trouble."

Jack snorted. "It seems I'm the one who got you into trouble." He muttered mildly, despite his hurt.

Sam's hand shot up to half cover her face and she let out an uneven sigh, but she was smiling. "Yeah well what's done is done."

"And can't be undone." Jack finished.

"Not that I would want too." She quietly admitted.

"Me either." He smiled at her and she shyly looked away.

Okay so the reality of their circumstances could not be much worse, but for the moment Sam just wanted to be happy in the knowledge that now that Jack knew, this would be happening under better circumstances. She would not be alone anymore. Maybe she did not have to move to Canada after all. Truth be told, as crazy as it sounded, that had been the bit she had been dreading the most, Canadian's were weird and she really did not want her kid to be one. She looked into his eyes and saw the reflection of her own contentment. "You know we need to come up with-"

"A plan? Yeah I know. But for now can we just…not." He had moved a little closer to her and placed his hand on her knee. She smiled and placed her own hand on top of his.

"Sure Jack."

He grinned and stood up. "Come on." He said pulling her up.

"Where are we going?" She asked her heart giving a little skip, she was not at all sure she could handle anything more at the moment.

"Nowhere." he said smiling affectionately. "I'm just not sitting on the floor all evening." He took the time to remove his boots then patted the couch between his legs as he made himself comfortable on it. Sam acquiesced and took up her place close to him.

It was a much more intimate position than the last time she had accepted his invite, what with his leg running the full length of the inside of the cushions and his other knee far outstretched, but Sam felt completely as ease and she leaned back against his chest, one hand on his knee and the other protectively interlaced with his across her stomach. It felt good, natural, normal.

Sure they had an awful lot to sort out but for the moment she was content to settle herself back and concentrate on the reassuring rise and fall of his chest. He sighed deeply and using his free hand played with her hair.

She warm against him and he finally felt himself relax for the first time in two months. Later he would take the time to be angry but for the moment he just wanted to enjoy the fantastic news that his future with Samantha Carter was well and truly sealed. He pulled the throw down over them and it was not very long before they were both asleep and dreaming of their newly unfolding life that lay in before them.

**

* * *

**

AN: Okay before anyone starts I have nothing against Canadian's, I just think that Sam might. Just a little touch of irony...

Jack and Sam are riding high, but we all know that can never last, the next chapter brings us to the bottom of the rollercoaster, be prepared, tragedy inbound.


	18. A Sudden Change

**AN: Once again, tragedy inbound...**

* * *

17. A SUDDEN CHANGE

* * *

Sam was pulled into wakefulness by the notion that something was wrong. Waking with anxiety was something that she had been experiencing all week so she forced the feeling away as best she could. Janet had reassured her that it was perfectly normal to have bouts of worry at this stage. It was her body's way of getting her to slow down. Again not overly unusually, a tight band was gripping her middle but the sharp pains that were corkscrewing down through her were new. She uncovered herself and pushed up from her position, her arms wrapping round her waist. The sensation settled a little so she got to her feet. Jack stirred but did not wake as she recovered him with the throw and headed for the bathroom trying to remain calm. She was feeling a little light-headed.

Intending to simply go to the loo she happened to looked down and next thing she knew a keening sound was coming from somewhere. She did not recognise the source of the noise or much care. Only the fact that there was too much blood, on her hands, on her clothes and now on the floor mattered.

The world momentarily disappeared and she was on the tiles with her back against the bath, her lungs on fire and she had no idea why. Somehow Jack knew something was going on and crash-landed at her side. She did not understand his intuition but was glad of his apparition and clung to him. The terrifying inhuman wailing was still sounding through the room she wished it would stop.

Jack fought back the insane panic that had gripped his entire being. Sam was screaming and she would not stop. He could not get a grip enough to figure out why. His thoughts were jamming and his words were stuck in some kind of bottleneck so he just clung to her as she clung to him, her nails already drawing blood out of his back. He focussed on the slight stinging sensation as a point of orientation, it worked…the bottleneck burst. "Stop it! For the love of god, stop screaming Sam!" He emptied his lungs as he howled at her.

Still unaware of her actions Sam shut up like it had been a direct order. Her throat was burning from the misuse of her vocal cords. It had been her, she suddenly realised, she had been the source of the most hideous sound in the world. Jack's head was buried in the crook of her neck, she had caused him to fall apart. He was still quietly pleading with her to stop even though she was completely silent. Swallowing hard she clawed at him, something was wrong but for the life of her she did not know if it was a problem with him or her, she had completely blocked out the last few minutes. The last thing she remembered was falling asleep. A sharp spiral of pain tugged at her and she tensed her whole body.

Jack suddenly came alright when he realised that the constant screaming of the woman he loved was only continuing in his head. She had gone poker stiff and was looking down between her knees. Her breathing rate was picking up, heading towards frantic. His world bottomed out as he realised what was happening. "No." He called out and burst onto his feet and into action. The trouble was he had no idea what to do.

"Jack help me!" She begged, her eyes betraying the high level of fear that was beginning to grip her. She looked at her fingers. "There's so much blood. It hurts." She was so pale.

He was stood rooted to the spot, his mind running a mile a minute. He was trying to think of what to do but only the same useless nine words were rattling around on a loop. '…help her Jack, fix things. Now! For god sake help her Jack…'

"Janet!" He suddenly blurted and jetted from the room. Sam wailed at the loss of his presence.

"Come on, come on pick up damn it." He paced back and forth as the phone rang on, eight, nine, ten rings, eleven… He hung up on her home line and dialled her cell. One ring, two rings… His patience was running out. Wheeling round he went to the window. He had no concept of what time it was but it was pitch black outside and still raining.

"_Hello…"_

"Where the hell are you Janet? Sam needs you, there's something very wrong-" The voice on the other end continued over his words.

"_You have reached Janet Frasier…"_

It was her damned answering service. He paced back across the room waiting to leave a proper message. "Janet this is Jack. It's Sam, there's something very wrong, there's blood everywhere. Call me when you get this, I'm taking her to the SGC. I hope to god you are there when we get there." He hung up and chucked the house phone onto a chair. Somewhere in the back of his mind he remembered she was on call tonight and so would be within the mountain complex. Now that he had a plan he was crystal clear in his actions.

Grabbing up the throw that had fallen to the floor he tore back into the bathroom. He skidded to a halt, his socks taking him overly far into the room even as he momentarily froze again. She was flopped down against the bath her eyes closed. "Sam? Sam can you hear me?" He shook her shoulders but she did not respond. Surely none of this was real? She was much paler than he had ever seen her and he registered the signs of excessive blood loss. For reasons he couldn't quite fathom, probably trying to save her dignity, he took the time to pull her sweatpants back up around her waist before he wrapped her in the throw.

Then he was up alone and away out the door into the rain. He threw open the back door of his truck and returned to get Sam. She flopped around a little as he carried her through the night. As gently as he could he placed her across the back seat and made his way around the car. Damn the front door. He bolted back up the drive and knowing that Sam always kept the deadlock on, he didn't have to do more than slam it. Something glistened on the path in front of him as he returned and he stopped to pick it up. It was his car key. How on earth had that got there? Not taking the time to think about it, he jumped into the saturated front seat of his Hi-Lux and drove away at top speed.

* * *

Janet wandered out of the shower in the woman's locker room and noticed that she had a new voice message on her cell where it sat on the top of her kitbag. It was just after midnight and her pager had remained inactive so it obviously was not urgent. It was probably Cassie, she was the only one who would ring her at this hour. Too bad, the teen would just have to get one of her friends to take her home. If she was old enough to go to the parties and be responsible, she sure could organise her own lift home. She trusted her daughter. Besides Janet couldn't exactly just leave the base on a personal errand, she was on call for goodness sake.

She slipped her white jacket back on simply because it was easier carried that way and finished towelling off her hair. Sam was right, keeping it shorter was easier.

Sam…

Something tugged at the back of her mind and she picked up the cell. What if it was Sam that was trying to get in touch, lord knows how emotional the woman had been these last few weeks, but she was well out the other side of that now. She had even managed to sleep undisturbed the whole night through for two nights now. Janet smiled, reminded of how much like a small child Sam had been, waking her up in the middle of the night with bad dreams and unnecessary worry. Not that Janet minded, she was actually relieved that the woman felt she could so easily come to her.

Sure enough it was Sam's number on the dial. Janet rolled her eyes. She probably wanted to talk now that Jack had left. She dialled in and waited for the message.

* * *

Janet was running through the halls, heading to the infirmary. She had no idea if the General had arrived in with Sam yet but she needed to be there.

Thankfully the halls of her domain were completely quiet. There was not a soul in her infirmary apart for the two snoozing orderlies that were on duty with her. They bounced awake as she clattered through the door. "Good they're not here yet. Desmond, set up in iso-room three. I'll need as much A positive as you can find, a full kit from the drugs cabinet and you had better bring the crash-cart in just in case."

"Yes Ma'am." snapped the orderly, then hesitate. "Ma'am, can I ask why?"

"General O'Neill is on his way in with a patient, as far as I can tell she's lost a lot of blood and we need to act fast."

"She? Is it Colonel Carter, Ma'am." The guys face turned completely pale.

Janet glared at him. "Is that important right now? Go!" She yelled at the young man and he disappeared.

"Matthew I need you to bring round the gurney. They're on their way in from the surface so at the very least we can meet them at the elevator. I'm going to try to call the General see if I can get an update."

The sandy haired man got to it with a curt nod as Janet dialled Jack cell. She did not leave a message when he didn't answer she just hung up and tried again.

**

* * *

**

AN: Phew! Tomorrow night finishes all this up. Two more chapters and the epilogue. As always feedback welcome :)


	19. Out Of His Hands

**AN: Not much to say this time, so just jump on in...**

* * *

18. OUT OF HIS HANDS

* * *

Jack's phone was ringing mad in his pocket but there was nothing he could do about it. Sam was cradled to his chest and he was slowly descending through the mountain in a crappy metal box. The rain had soaked him through to the skin but he could not feel the cold. All he cared about was getting Sam some help. She had not moved since he had put her in the car and he couldn't help but worry it was a very bad sign. She was getting very heavy in his arms and he still had another elevator to go so he slid down the back wall and rested her weight on his knees. This gave him a free hand to fish out his cell which had started ringing for the third time. He looked at the callerID, not that he needed to.

"Janet, hi, where are you…Oh thank god. I'm in the first elevator, we're just passing eight." He looked up to confirm. "Good I'll meet you there."

He snapped the phone shut and looked at the red smear that ran across it. Tossing it down, he returned his attention to Carter's face. She was ashen grey and he was growing more scared by the minute. He took her by the chin and calling her name tried to wake her. All he succeeded in doing was spreading her blood from his own hands over her face. "Sam, please!" He begged. He looked up again, they were nearly there. Frasier was going to meet them. He knew when those doors finally opened she would be right there waiting. He tried to push to his feet so he could look strong for her but he was totally spent. He legs simply would not work. He was about to try again when the doors slid open surprising him. He had not even noticed that they had stopped.

Janet and some other guy swooped in and lifted her away from him. Suddenly bereft of his burden he fell forward reaching after her, his fingers caught the throw and it fell down to him as they moved off. Something of his sensibilities still remained and they told him to stop sprawling around on the SGC floor. So he hauled himself up using the metal frame as a brace.

"Come on General." The doctor urged when she saw him linger behind. His bewildered eyes were slow to focus on her then she saw that he understood and he was moving forward.

Into the second elevator Janet was doing a quick assessment. "When we get her down Matt I want you to get the blood transfusion started straight away. I'll administer everything else, you know she's got a unique physiology right?" The guy was new and civilian.

"Yes Doctor Frasier, because of the blending with the Tok'ra. I read the report. I've read all the reports." Cautiously he eyed the General. He was wary of the man in charge and had heard the rumours about him and Colonel Carter being an item despite the regs. He had never held much stock in it but now he wasn't so sure. Here they were together in the middle of the night and the man was not behaving the way he thought a military general should be in the face of an emergency. But then again he had been told that General O'Neill was cut from anything but standard military cloth.

"Matt are you listening?"

"Yes Doctor, carry on."

* * *

The doors opened and Jack stumbled as he tried to keep up. Frasier stopped him from entering the room with them and he was left alone with just her throw. He watched through the glass for a short while but could not tell what was going on and that only frustrated him to the point of despair. Sam's life was well and truly out of his hands.

Pushing off the door he looked at the marks that were left there. Puzzled he glanced down. His throat closed over as he took note of his blood soaked uniform. He looked at the dark patches that weren't quite red. He had been covered in blood before more times he cared to remember, but this was different. Not because it was Sam's blood, he had handled that before too, but because of the nature of the stuff. It was life giving blood, highly precious life giving blood and now it was taking life. Jack knew that the massive level of haemorrhaging Carter had experienced already meant that there was a serious possibility that his loss could be doubly hard. But he refused to think about that.

He collapsed into the nearest chair, Sam's throw covering his knees. Slowly he took the time to look at it. There was evidence of grief there already. The fabric not only carried more of her blood but it had other things, things he did not recognise, things that were brown and grey. Instantly he saw enough to know that it was too late for the baby so his prayers turned to Sam. He could not lose her too, that would be the cruellest fate in the world. He took up the edges of the throw and carefully folded it in on itself so as not to lose the content. A fresh damp feeling seeped through onto the tops of his legs.

It was all too much, he needed a quiet space, a private place where he would not be seen. The nearest one he could think of was just down the hall. He carefully set the throw aside and drifted towards it.

* * *

He pulled up short in the doorway. Carter's lab was almost desolate. He had forgotten that there was very little of her left in the room. She had packed up or handed over everything that made the place uniquely hers. There were no little knick-knacks for him to fiddle with or great honking pieces of half built god-knows-what-they-actually-did-maybe-not-even-Carter machines, even her ever-present welding mask and gloves were gone. All that was left was the standard USAF property.

As Jack wandered into the room he could not shake the feeling that it was some kind of premonition, some kind of omen that he was going to lose her too. He pressed out a shaky breath and looked about. There had to be something of her left. I mean he had not approved her request so she couldn't have packed up absolutely _everything_. If he could just find one thing he knew she would be okay, he just knew it.

Finally he found it. A tiny piece of paper and it was trapped down the back of one of the units. He dropped onto his hands and knees and reached in to retrieve it. Sitting with his back against the unit he turned it over. The numbers and symbols meant absolutely nothing to him. It had "Naquadah conversion rates." at the top and descended into the kind of math that had always made his eyes glaze over. She loved that stuff. This piece of paper truly was Sam Carter and he was staining it with the blood of her loss.

Everything crashed in around him and tears started to fall. For the first time since he had actually accepted Charlie's death all those years ago, he allowed himself to cry unabated. It was the strangest feeling. It did not make him feel any better. People always said that crying made you feel better but it never did, not for him. It had always made him feel worse, like he was weak, less of a man. Teal'c would never cry, he knew that much. Daniel cried all the time, more often than Carter ever had, but that was just his way. More often than Carter ever _does_ he corrected himself wondering why he had used the past tense. Because she had a lot of tears to come that's why.

God how was he ever going to tell her? They hadn't even had time to come to terms with the news, not together and now it was all gone. She was going to be absolutely devastated. He was, and he had only known for a few hours. She had known for weeks and had tried to protect him. She tried to be strong and do this all on her own so that he wouldn't get into trouble. Jack sobbed all the harder at the thought of her attempted sacrifice. Somewhere deeper he knew he should be very angry, but right now regret was the only thing that consumed him.

If only he had figured this out sooner. If only he hadn't been so caught up in himself. If he had been able to reassure her sooner maybe she wouldn't have been so stressed out and all of this could have been avoided. He could see it all now, right from the beginning. He could even pinpoint the day her reactions to him changed, the day she must have gotten the news from Janet. He should have known. Daniel had been right, she was trying to leave because she thought she had to, and now he understood her urgency and her avoidance. But at what cost had all this come? All the secrecy, all the lies. He dropped his head onto his knees as he once again tried to deny himself the fact that her fate was out of his hands, to deny the fact that he could still lose her too.

He was chilled to the bone and shivering in his wet socks when Janet found him a good while later. She packed him off to have a shower and then insisted that she give him a shot to help him sleep. He didn't argue, he didn't have the heart. He was just glad that the throw was gone when they had wandered back up past the chairs, that and the fact that he could visit Sam just as soon as he woke up again. It seemed physically at least, she was going to be just fine.

**

* * *

**

AN: Final chapther coming up.


	20. Together

**AN: And finally...**

* * *

19. TOGETHER

* * *

Teal'c stepped through the wormhole and Daniel was waiting for him. He was surprised to see the man and looked about for Colonel Carter and O'Neill. But only Daniel stood solemnly at the base of the ramp. "What has transpired Daniel Jackson?" He asked knowing that all was not well.

Daniel was a little taken aback by the Jaffa's intuitiveness, he thought he had been hiding his feeling rather well. Not well enough it seemed, so he spilled. "Teal'c, something terrible has happened."

"We shall discuss the matter in private." Teal'c handed over his staff to the waiting SF and swept quickly from the room, already aware of the eavesdropping of the guards on duty. It would not do to have a sensitive matter aired in such a place. The sadness Daniel Jackson's voice portrayed could only mean that something highly personal and tragic had occurred.

Teal'c headed for the elevator but Daniel grabbed him by the arm and dragged him up the metal staircase. He did not have time to wait till they were in quarters, too many people already knew and Teal'c needed to hear this from him. He did not let go of the larger man until they were in Jack's office and the door was closed.

Teal'c felt a tremor run through him. Daniel Jackson was behaving in a highly peculiar manner, and where was O'Neill? It was unlike him to leave his office open and unattended. He watched as his friend paced back and forth. "Tell me." He ordered.

Daniel chanced a glance at his friend. His usually calm features showed undercurrents of worry and he seemed to be holding himself tighter than usual. Sighing he threw himself into a chair and looked directly up at the big man. His throat was hoarse as he spoke. "You'd best sit Teal'c, this could take a while."

* * *

Daniel Jackson had been correct, the full explanation had taken a while. And now Teal'c sat with what felt like a hole in his heart. The news had left him so that his shoulders would no longer straighten and his head was almost too heavy to bear upright.

He could not afford to let any further weakness show as the younger man before him, who was still quite often like a child, had already latched onto his perceived strength and was seeking his support. O'Neill would also need a rock and Samantha? He had no idea what he could truly offer a grieving mother who had never known her child. His experience did not fully run to such grief. A woman with such a loss rarely accepted the sympathies of others…especially that of males who could never truly comprehend their pain.

"Would you like to come and see them now?" Daniel asked quietly, interrupting his forlorn thoughts.

"I think it is that I must." Came the equally quiet reply.

* * *

Jack's bones ached from sitting in the same position at Sam's side. It had been his station now for two whole days. Nothing and no-one would drag him from that spot. He had not moved even to eat or sleep. Janet had offered him a bed right next to Carter but even that was too far away. His own cramped limbs and utter exhaustion were nothing compared to the pain that she was visibly going through.

It had taken almost a full day before she would even look at him and even longer for her to allow him to touch her. Most of the time she had spent turned away from him with her face buried in her pillow. Jack knew she was crying but he couldn't help her. She would not allow it. It was just like the whole Jolinar thing all over again but worse. This time she felt guilty that she had let him down and that it was somehow all her fault. The Jolinar thing had never been her fault, never once had she admitted or even thought that, but this time round the only words she spoken since she woke up and Janet had told her the news were.

"I'm sorry Jack. I should have tried harder."

She would not hear words of condolence or consolation. Protesting that she had not done anything wrong only made her silently furious and telling her it was an act of fate had caused her to begin wailing inconsolably, still pulling herself away from human touch. So in the end Jack had said nothing. He had banished Daniel when his words upset her and even Frasier was careful around them. His silence, or his presences, or maybe just simple time had seemed to make her stronger. Eventually she had turned to face him, but would not make eye-contact. Food was a no go and would be for a while. Jack's own plates were still returning to the commissary untouched.

The biggest break through had come in the early hours of the morning when Jack had stirred from an unplanned doze to find her upright and sobbing. He had reached out to her and she had accepted his touch, just his fingertips first, then pulling him closer and onto the bed. For a while she had cried into his chest and he had rubbed her back and kissed her hair. Still no words passed between them, not even a gentle 'hush'. Then she had turned away and laid down bringing him with her. He had tentatively stretched out along the bed and she settled back into him and allowed him to hold her. Careful not to lay his hands anywhere near her waist for fear of upsetting her he had fidgeted for a bit until she laced her fingers with his own and pulled his arm tight across her ribcage as if to protect her.

He had taken her change of heart gladly and had pressed himself against her as fully as his restricted position would allow, attempting to give her all of himself and take away what suffering he could.

Janet had found them like that first thing and had banished anyone from entering the room, even the painfully aggrieved Doctor Jackson. She had erected a screen around them and posted a guard at the door. "Undisturbed rest. No visitors. No food." She had informed the sentinel. And so into the early afternoon they had slept only for all the pain and grief to start again when they awoke.

Now Daniel stood anxiously in the doorway as Teal'c advanced across the room. Jack blinked at the man. Was it that time already? He hadn't even heard the klaxons. Stiffly he rose to greet him. The Jaffa came round the bed and stood directly before him. "How fairs she?"

"Not good Teal'c, but at least she's asleep again."

The big man's face showed plain concern, then something shifted and his solemn gaze became more intense. "And what of you?"

Jack hesitated, he had not expect the question to be so direct. "Me? I'll be fine." But he couldn't even raise his head to convince himself.

Two strong hands came out and grasped his arms just above the elbow. Jack's eyes trailed upwards. "You have my deepest condolences on your loss. Many would not understand what it is to lose a one that you have never known, but I know of this pain. Drey'auc suffered such a loss. My strength is yours."

"Thanks T." Jack was welling up. His friend's words and open empathy had taken him unawares. He pulled away and cleared his throat. He found his focus on the man who still stood reluctantly in the doorway. "Come on in Daniel and shut the door would you?" His voice was still a little off kilter.

Daniel smiled weakly, his relief evident and made his way across the room, pulling up a third chair. Sadly the three men sat around the bed, metaphorically and physically watching Carter's back as she slept. Each of them became lost in their own thoughts and each drew solace from the other. They were SG-1 past and present. Together they would help Sam and each other through this. They were family, that's what they did.

The End.

**

* * *

**

AN: And so there you have it. The family reunited. You can leave it there or flick through the epilogue, it just ties up a few of the loose ends that I found in an attempt to bring things back onto a more normal footing. If you don't do epilogues, thank you so much for everything, without my readers I would be nothing ;)


	21. EPILOGUE

**AN: Just to round things up and get us back on track...**

* * *

EPILOGUE

* * *

It took a long time for things to settle down after Jack and Sam's loss.

Though nobody actually was, rows broke out over who was to blame and Jack threatened to bring charges against Doctor Frasier for her deception and her fraud. Naturally they never came to pass because Sam didn't want that and eventually he recognised that the doctor was only trying to do the right thing by her closest friend.

They were firm friends again by the time Cassie made up her mind that she wanted to go to college in California. She was intent on studying medicine, like her mother and Janet decided that while she was grown up, she wasn't _that_ grown up and started making preparations to move with her. She knew exactly what college med students' parties were like.

Sam took a six month leave-of-absence to give herself some time to adjust and Jack, having taken a few personal days while Sam was still in the infirmary, demanded to take all of the leave he was owed so that he could be with her. Naturally this caused a commotion up the line but General Hammond stepped on the recommendation of the President and sorted it all out. Much to Walter's delight he even temporarily returned to run the SGC alongside Colonel Makepeace while Jack took the time he needed.

Hammond then offered the couple, for that's what they were slowly learning to be now that Sam was on extended leave, a surprise solution to their problem of not being able to be together if and when she decided to return to work. He was retiring and wanted to recommend Jack to replace him as head of Home-World Security. The job came with an extra star and the added bonus of Jack no longer being Sam's direct CO.

One, General Hank Landry was more than willing to take over the running of the SGC and Hammond insisted he came highly recommended. As for SG-1, the young and ever eager Colonel Cameron Mitchell had earned his right to try out for the spot, leaving Sam the freedom to choose whether or not she wanted to return to SG-1 in a non-lead role. (An option that had not previously been available, it was lead SG-1 or nothing so sayeth the big dogs).

She dithered for a while (especially after Daniel and Teal'c moved on to do their own thing.) between the fast-track desk job in DC where Jack was going to be, rejoining SG-1 or becoming Head of the R&D in Nevada. Then a new threat broke out across the galaxy and they all found themselves being sucked back in. It seemed other work just could not compare to saving your home planet and billions of others over and over again.

Much to Daniel's despair a new face arrived on the scene in the form of Vala Mal Doran from the planet Kook, he claimed. His friends reckoned the archaeologist complained a little too much about the tall, attractive, dark haired woman with a personality the size of an Ori super-gate. They decided to watch them closely. Surely it wouldn't take _them_ nearly nine years and a tragedy to figure it all out.

And so things settled down for the group of friends and their new lives found an old routine. SG-1 travelled the galaxy and Jack learned to beat the politicians at their own game. Atlantis came knocking once in a while and there was even talk of launching a computer game to find a new genius for an as yet secret project. Jack could not for the life of him figure out what they wanted another explode-a-brain for. Surely three super-brains were enough for any galaxy, two galaxies as it happened. I mean they already had Carter, the up and coming Hailey and that allergic-to-citrus-jerkwad MacKay. The Pegasus Galaxy was always going to be way, way too close for someone who was _that_ interested in his Carter.

But no matter, no doubt all would become clear in time. Until then he would just have to trust that all of his guys knew what they were at and that they were doing the right thing.

**

* * *

**

AN: And so that's a wrap. Thank you all so much for your reviews, suggestions and support. I hope you enjoyed my take on things and I'll try to get something else out of my muddled brain before long, perhaps something a little more up beat next time.

Cheers again guys and I'll catch ya later Space-monkeys ;)


End file.
